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coffee-and-couch phase

A slang expression describing the moment you find yourself drinking the same black coffee as your dad, marking the realization that you’re now considered "old", especially when still living at parents' home past your 23rd birthday. It highlights the irony of being too old for youthful independence while still in a transitional phase.
I took a sip of that bitter black coffee and suddenly felt like I was 30, still living with my parents at 23. Guess I’ve officially hit the coffee-and-couch phase!
by Emotional Cruiser August 9, 2025
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couch dolphin

1. (noun) A colloquial name for the Indo-Appalachian right-finned porpoise, usually found gesticulating betwixt couch cushions very racistly. Swims to the very far right and has a parasitic relationship with the “greatest” and whitest of sharks, when convenient.

2. (noun) A person who has intimate relations with an upholstered sitting apparatus, while they are watching p0rnpoise, because the concept of true human connection perplexes them.
Well… that Jim Dave Vance fellow turned out to be a real, self-described couch dolphin. Yikes. Is this why Cleveland had to get rid of Sea World?
by Judith Jetson Lightyear July 27, 2024
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Couch crotch

When your genitals develop a smelly smell after prolonged couch sitting. Usually from build up of sweat from sitting too long and/or persitant need of showering.
I spent the day off playing video games and my girlfriend wont have sex with me because I have couch crotch.

I really need to shower, I have some serious couch crotch.
by Lilbritt October 22, 2018
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Loser Couch

A couch in which the losers at -insert video game you're playing here- are forced to sit while they wait to rejoin the next round of said game.
Lizzy, You are playing like you should be sitting on the loser couch with Blake!
by MoronicMaureen December 24, 2009
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couch king

Man, that hookup sucked. He was such a couch king.
by Kation March 19, 2022
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couch flower

a chic who could do something with themselves but opts for marathons of wheel of fortune, chain smoking and not seeing daylight for long stretches of time, but complains about being bored and having no friends online
that chic used to party ,but now she doesnt do shit but memorize the internet and watch gameshows! she really bloomed into a couch flower!
by yourmomsfb September 14, 2010
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oliver couch

when you sit down and your willy gets caught in between the cushions
Person: im gonna go sit down
Also Person: FUCK SAKE WILLY DOWN GRAB THE MANDEM IVE GOT OLIVER COUCH
by DrMonkNugget124 June 19, 2023
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