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Chicago Bears Tax

A mysterious curse where any football player who signs with the Chicago Bears immediately forgets how to play football. Scientists estimate a 75% drop in skill the second the pen hits the contract. Side effects include dropped passes, missed tackles, and uncontrollable crying at Soldier Field.
Man, he was a Pro Bowler last year. Now? Looks like he paid the Chicago Bears Tax.
by 34344444 September 7, 2025
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Chicago goatse

To make monkey noises while spreading your buttcheeks all while forcing all blood pressure to your rectum.
Hey man, did you see TheDooo when we drove by? I think he was doing the “Chicago Goatse” on the sidewalk…”
by JvstSayin178 January 16, 2025
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Chicago goatse

The Chicago goatse is when a man and woman engage in funky time and the lady sticks 8 of her fingers in your ass and stretches your hole as far as it will go the Chicago part comes into the equation when the lady uses au jus as the lubricant
“I was with Melissa the other night she gave me a Chicago goatse!”
Damn dude rip your ass
by Zanderguy January 16, 2025
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Chicago flicker gooning

When you get a BD to edge a GD which causes a universal blue and red nut to flood the streets of Chicago
God damn those Chicago flicker gooning gooners there gonna flood the streets
by Not south side February 8, 2025
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University of Chicago Labschool

The worst place to be if your looking to get sleep or anything like that. All of the people there have bags under their eyes.
The students there are either rich republican snobs that pay full price, or the weirdest and yet coolest faculty kid you've ever met. If you are in 6th grade as of 2024-2025 DO NOT COME HERE. ALL OF THE 6TH GRADERS ARE INSANE. The people you encounter are going to be one of these: 1. nice but the most obnoxious person you've EVER met 2. Incredibly mean and literally all of the ists, and phobics. 3. Beatlemanic 4. smart and insane 5. ridiculous amounts of theater kid 6. video game and war obsessed: failing everything (note: these may occur together in different patterns or alone)
Billy bobby fornire: "I love 80s music, speak German, and I read Dostoevsky for fun."

King Robert the 3rd: "You must go to University of Chicago Labschool."
by fornire March 8, 2025
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bo from chicago

hes bo and hes from chicago, has some d1 prospects but dropped them for a monk. hes bo from chicago tbh.
Bo from chicago. Wow thats bo from chicago
by bdustdadawg March 6, 2023
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Chicago hammer marks

While attempting to strike a nail, one misses their target and leaves an dent in the wood beside the nail.
While Attempting to nail his fence, Jordan frequently missed his target, leaving scores of Chicago hammer marks.
by FrontRowJonny March 9, 2023
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