On the wank 

Bitching about nothing; excessive complaining for no good reason.

"oh my co workers were on the wank today, it was doing my nut"

"I got stuck with Gary on carpool, he was on the wank about his hatred of Greenpeace supporters and then he hit a cyclist."

On the wank by Hairy Gee May 23, 2024

wank on the beach

when you don’t have all the ingredients for sex on the beach ,settle for what you’ve already got, have a wank on the beach

Bro can you give me another wank on the beach, it’s so good!?!?

wank on the beach by CocktailKing67 October 13, 2025

Wanking on the door knob 

The informal term for Auto Erotic Asphyxiaton by hanging onesself from the door - commonly used by coroners & medical examiners in informal setting

Did you determine the cause of death Scott?
I think we can rule out foul play Ed, I'm fairly certain he was just wanking on the door knob.

Wanking on the door knob by Ed Bosh February 12, 2022

wanking like peter on the dole 

Masturbating 11 times a day while sponging off society.

We all started wanking like peter on the dole when we saw the bottle of midleton.

it was like john just grew a badonkadonk.

wanking like peter on the dole by elburno March 8, 2008