1) Max goes out at 6:30am to leave for work and discovers the front tyre on his bike is completely flat. Max looks angrily at the tyre and proclaims "oh you bastard-fuck!".
2) Miriam goes to
the fridge for her half of that
chocolate cake she's been
looking forward to all day, only to discover that her brother Danny has eaten it. "That was for me Danny you bastard-fuck" she then wails.