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Turtle Touching Cotton 

When one has to "go" so badly that the shit starts coming out and touches your underwear before you make it to the restroom. Can be literal or an expression that the "turtle's" head is beginning to come out.
I tried to make it to the restroom in time and yelled, "Turtle Touching Cotton"! already!

Turtle Toucher 

Anyone who is weird, acts in a slow, special, awkward manner.
Brailee's fuck buddy Jonas is a 12 year old turtle toucher.
Turtle Toucher by Gdin22 January 28, 2015

touching the turtle 

Big Texas Hair is sitting in her cubical touching the turtle. I heard her moans and now I want to wash my ears out with bleach.

Your girlfriend looks really happy.
Yeah, we were in the other room, playing touch the turtle.