Fap Handed 

To receive a hand job aka a handy or old fashioned.

Your mom fap handed me under the dinner table last night.

My uncle snuck in my room and fap handed me.

The coach caught the team as they fap handed each other in the locker room.

Fap Handed by Eaton Holgoode December 1, 2017

fathandedness 

The affliction of having chubby or cumbersome – but not necessarily large – hands, making everyday manual tasks more complicated.

I tried to rescue your engagement ring from the plughole but my fathandedness wouldn't allow it.

fathandedness by ztubbz July 12, 2010