Conditional Hilarity Syndrome 

Where, if you hate someone, nothing they say will be funny to you, no matter how funny it actually is. Additionally, when you like someone, every little thing they say is funny no matter how stupid it actually is.

James- Hey guys look! (makes unfunny face)
Hilary- Hahaha! James you're so funny!

Hank- Man Hilary must really have Conditional Hilarity Syndrome because that was the least funny thing anyone has ever done on planet earth.

Conditional Hilarity Syndrome by Sleet October 5, 2009

Conditional Bitch 

Person who does things only if others do, showing no independence of thought.

I’m in…..lets see who wants to go first….so who’s in?

Decide for yourself Conditional Bitch.

Conditional Bitch by Lirone1234 January 5, 2009

conditional friend 

Also Good Time Charlie

Yeah, Mike's my conditional friend. As long as I have an extra girl to throw at him, he'll hang around.

conditional friend by Vee Are Are Schee May 6, 2004

conditional nice guy 

A man who takes on the aspects of a nice guy, but only until he is rejected. At that point, he will abandon her and redirect his efforts toward other girls. While the result can be problematic for the girl who just rejected him, especially if he previously went to great lengths to do nice things for her, he will justify his behavior with the claim that he doesn't like being used.

Me: "I'm a conditional nice guy."
Other guy: "So you're a douchebag?"
Me: "No, I am a nice guy, but only until she rejects me."
Other guy: "But she has the right to say 'no'."
Me: " I hate being used just as much as she does."
Other guy: "Touché"

conditional nice guy by snakemasterepic August 27, 2016

Conditional person 

Someone you cant depend on because they are wishy-washy and only stick around only when its beneficial for them. As soon as things get tough, uncomfortable or uninteresting, they are gone. Their loyalty and character are contingent on the situation at hand, meaning, they aren't sincere or dependable. They're selfish and inconsistent- fake. They're always switching up their position and views in order to appeal to the person they are trying to impress. They're superficial and shallow. Not deep.

She won't show up if there's nothing in it for her. She's a conditional person. She'll act like she cares, as long as she gets what she wants.

Conditional person by LetsBeReal1001 December 18, 2016

Conditional Invitation 

When someone is invited to a social event on the condition that they don't come. Usually done to make sure someone knows that you don't want them there, rather then that you simply forgot to invite them.

'You can come out djanning with us on one condition, you don't come.'

-Textbook example of the conditional invitation

Conditional Invitation by robertstapelsmum October 19, 2009

Conditional Masculinity

When a man, or men, are allowed to display traditional masculine traits such as competiveness, aggression, or stoicism, among others, without demonization by society, so long as displaying said traits benefits society, and especially women. Coined by YouTube content creator R.P.M.

Bob: "I don't get it. When I lift weights and practice kickboxing three days a week, my girlfriend says I'm engagung in 'toxic masculinity' because it's aggressive behavior, but she had no problem with me when I checked the guy at the mall for trying to get her number."

Joe: "That's called Conditional Masculinity; you know, when you put yourself in harm's way for society and women with no benefit to yourself."

Conditional Masculinity by Silky Ink Studios June 6, 2022