Phantom Construction

When unnecessary cones, barrels, and lane shifts screw up your morning commute but there isn't a construction worker in sight. A/K/A/ government efficiency at its best.
I was half an hour late due to some phantom construction. Turns out, no one has worked on site in days.
by UDANONYMOUS August 16, 2010
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schmitt-faced

getting too drunk to properly governs ones own behavior, likely leading to slurring speech, stumbling, gazing at female body parts with no regard for being considered creepy, repeatedly hugging other people's wives/girlfriends, and/or shitting oneself.
Joe got so schmitt-faced last night that he woke up spooning his roommate
by udanonymous April 28, 2008
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