English phrase intended as a blatant lie to obscure an act of poor judgment on one's part. Originated with regard to making horrible statements on Twitter, of course, but can really be used in just about any situation and be as believable.
Child - Mom, you were supposed to pick me up from school at 3:30 today.
Mom (obviously drunk) - My Twitter account was hacked.
v., onomatopoeia for the sound that Gmail chat makes when someone sends you an instant message.
Hold on, someone just glonked me.