jerk off bracelet

Using an activity tracker bracelet to determine how many miles you jerked off.

Me: "today I used my jerk off bracelet and determined that I jerked off for 3 miles and lost 69 calories. A new record!"

by kopask January 22, 2015

Bagel Jizz

when the cream cheese from the bagel you are eating gets in the corners of your mouth

co-worker: "You got some bagel jizz on your face"

by kopask January 19, 2015