Teddy Roosevelt

The act of having your sexual partner ignore the fact that you have just ejaculated on their chest, usually continuing sex as if nothing happened.

Girl: Cmon, ram me harder, yes! Yes!
Guy: Uh, I already blew my loa-
Girl: HARDER!!
Guy: Fuck, your pulling a teddy roosevelt

by jillstobbs_ April 18, 2018

Australian Wrapping Paper

Any type of paper used to stop the bleeding of a penis. Can be used for any situation where the penis bleeds, such a cut from a razor, a freak donkey-wagon accident, etc.

Man: Damn bitch, your asshole is so dry, you make my fucking dick bleed because of the friction you hoe!
Woman: Calm down, just use some Australian wrapping paper my dude.

by jillstobbs_ October 17, 2016

Wormhole Wank

When you stick a worm in your urethra and you have to ejaculate it out before it crawls in.

Mom: Jordan, do the damn dishes!
Jordan: Hang on, i'm doing a Wormhole wank!

Mom: You kept the bait from fishing earlier?

by jillstobbs_ April 19, 2018