Definitions by everythingiswrongwithyoubro.
The Kaleb
The Kaleb is the guy a (now) married girl dates RIGHT before dating the guy she will later marry. The Kaleb is most often a horror story of a relationship, and may include one or all of the following:
crippling insecurity via the kaleb.
abuse (verbal, sexual, physical, anything goes).
substance abuse.
cheating.
general red flags (manipulation, immature, projecting, etc.).
all around asshole-ish behavior
usually a relationship with The Kaleb ends with either a grand, dramatic and often relieving dumping of The Kaleb, who is never to be seen again, or the death of The Kaleb due to any of the reasons above, although most often substance abuse.
overall, a total asshat of a guy that is such a common archetype of douchebag that almost every married/engaged couple has a version of him across the world.
crippling insecurity via the kaleb.
abuse (verbal, sexual, physical, anything goes).
substance abuse.
cheating.
general red flags (manipulation, immature, projecting, etc.).
all around asshole-ish behavior
usually a relationship with The Kaleb ends with either a grand, dramatic and often relieving dumping of The Kaleb, who is never to be seen again, or the death of The Kaleb due to any of the reasons above, although most often substance abuse.
overall, a total asshat of a guy that is such a common archetype of douchebag that almost every married/engaged couple has a version of him across the world.
person 1: its been awhile since we last talked, what happened to that girl you dated?
person 2: I literally could not have been worse to her, I hear she got engaged to another guy just a few months afterwards and I cant even blame her.
person 1: so you're The Kaleb?
person 2: yeah pretty much man.
person 2: I literally could not have been worse to her, I hear she got engaged to another guy just a few months afterwards and I cant even blame her.
person 1: so you're The Kaleb?
person 2: yeah pretty much man.
The Kaleb by everythingiswrongwithyoubro. October 21, 2026
Dirty Major
when you hit up a high school freshman, then they lowkey steal your mother and you catch them scissoring violently and loudly on your living room couch when you get home
Bro #1: im never speaking to my mother again.
Bro #2: why?
Bro #1: the girl I asked out earlier gave her a dirty major!
Bro #3: stop asking out freshmen, dumbass
Bro #2: why?
Bro #1: the girl I asked out earlier gave her a dirty major!
Bro #3: stop asking out freshmen, dumbass
Dirty Major by everythingiswrongwithyoubro. April 21, 2026
Suzz
Suicidal huzz. Also known as mentally ill or "Menhera", These are people who are fetishized because of their mental illness/mental struggles
Weird bro: "Yo bro I was talking to the suzz earlier and they trauma dumped me, I think I'm in love"
Normal bro: TF is wrong with you bro!?!?!?
nothing against the mentally ill ppl out there, but yall gotta stop fetishizing these people, man.
Normal bro: TF is wrong with you bro!?!?!?
nothing against the mentally ill ppl out there, but yall gotta stop fetishizing these people, man.
Suzz by everythingiswrongwithyoubro. May 2, 2025