1 definition by doittoit88
Not to be confused with the primetime superhero, a "jack bauer" is probably the opposite of the man named Jack Bauer. The term originates from the term "bauer", which is a combination of the words beer and shower. In other words, a bauer is when you drink a beer while showering. To make it a "jack bauer", one must "jack it", or masturbate, while drinking a beer in the shower.
"Hey man, you wanna head out to that party now?"
"Yeah, let me just take a "jack bauer" first."
"Oh good call bro, I was gonna go do the same. But in my own shower. Why are you still putting quotes around jack bauer in this example conversation by the way?"
"Urban Dictionary made me do it. Also, I just got this thing that my laptop can sit on in the shower, so now I can watch internet porn during my jack bauers. Best jack bauers ever."
"This is an obnoxiously long conversation about a ridiculous topic."
"Ridiculously awesome."
"Word."
"Yeah, let me just take a "jack bauer" first."
"Oh good call bro, I was gonna go do the same. But in my own shower. Why are you still putting quotes around jack bauer in this example conversation by the way?"
"Urban Dictionary made me do it. Also, I just got this thing that my laptop can sit on in the shower, so now I can watch internet porn during my jack bauers. Best jack bauers ever."
"This is an obnoxiously long conversation about a ridiculous topic."
"Ridiculously awesome."
"Word."
by doittoit88 January 30, 2009