Skip to main content

Smart American Male's definitions

Ashley Tisdale

A careful yet still overrated actress signed with Disney whose best friends are a giant tampon named Vanessa Hudgens and her bitch, Zac Efron. She has been a Disney Channel regular since about 3 years ago and ever since then, she's been a marketing ploy to teeny boppers everywhere. From a temporary singing career, and soon to be a temporary acting career, it's only a matter of time before she'll start to shit bricks. She also is in bad shape and has decided to put her health in the hand of plastic surgeons. Opposed to Hayden Panettiere, Ashley Tisdale is one of several Disney-born stars that don't really impress anybody but the media.
Girl: Could you believe Ashley Tisdale is redoing her nose AGAIN?! What the hell?
Boy: I heard it's to improve her singing, but let's hope they fuck it up so badly that she can't even breath. I'm so sick of hearing about her.
by Smart American Male June 2, 2008
mugGet the Ashley Tisdale mug.

Vanessa Hudgens

A Filipino actress who just can't seem to grow out of childrens movies due to the marketing ploy called the "High School Musical" trilogy. Despite that she's had nude photos taken of her across the internet, there really is nothing or hers worth staring at. With no particular beauty, no particular talent, and a bitchy personality, the only thing that's keeping her a celebrity is (1) tenure from Disney, (2) her pussy, Zac Efron and her best friend, Ashley Tisdale, and (3) the media being forced to keep their eyes on her. One Disney alumni who practically is the opposite of Vanessa Hudgens is Hayden Panettiere, who actually has dedicated her life to making the world better for everyone.
Girl: Oh my god! Vanessa Hudgens is in here! Let's go meet her right away!
Boy: Hey, isn't that one of those "cool" kids from our school? Sure looks like it.
Girl: What?! But she's...uh...she's got a ton of money. Yeah!
Boy: Like the kind she finds in her underwear at clubs?
Girl: I guess your right, perhaps I can find girls hotter AND more friendly than her. It's possible.
by Smart American Male June 2, 2008
mugGet the Vanessa Hudgens mug.

sesame buns

A sexy woman's rump. Mainly the best physical feature, ironically.
Girl: Hi. Have we met before?
Boy: Hello...oooh, that's fine!
Girl: Heheheh! Like my sesame buns?
Boy: Ooh, yeah. I want a bite out of those cheeks!
by Smart American Male September 28, 2006
mugGet the sesame buns mug.

MLB

1. A poorly formatted league with the dumbest fans and dumbest officials that makes it the worst sport ever. It's consisted of 162 long tedious games with no time limit, whereas the "postseason" only lasts about a week long. The objective of the game is to hit a ball with a bat and guide your fellow Dominicans to home plate without getting out. But the real objective is to make the most money than any other player. Players are allowed to create buzz by talking trash, being a distraction, juicing up, and any other idiotic actions to attract the media.

2. "America's favorite past time".

3. "The Dominican Republic and Puerto Rico's favorite present time".

4. A sports league made up of 29 teams and one over-dramatic news tycoon (NYY).

5. An overrated drama queen of a sport. They care so much that Bud Selig pays ESPN to cover the MLB 24/7, even during the offseason. Whenever ESPN doesn't highlight any games, they whine like little bitches about the Yankees, the Red Sox, the Mets, Manny Ramirez, Ozzie Guillen, steroid scandals, retired players in investigations, and any other bullshit they can think of.

6. A method to make a load of money by barely doing anything at all. Such notable activities include standing on a grass field, sitting in a dugout, running 90 feet, running 10 feet to grab the baseball, standing on a small white bag, doing a couple of silly movements to throw the ball really fast to a teammate standing just 50 feet away, and many many more adrenalating activities. Of course, those other players don't get much money for running back and forth every play trying to swerve past other guys and lob the ball in an orange ring, or trying to carry the ball for about 300 feet at the expense that you get knocked down every play. Sure, I believe you.
1. The MLB sucks.

2. US Citizen: I used to like the MLB. Wow, was I such a stupid, stupid kid.

3. Islander: Like baseball is our religion! Every day we go to the church to pray to Babe Ruth.

4. Yankee fan: The Yankees are the best team EVER! Like they land all the good players and shit, and I'm oblivious to why that is. But I heard they are all great in bed, according to ESPN, so that must make them great players!

5. ESPN anchor: Did you know that there are 5 pitchers that homered in a 1-0 game? Just how stupid is this stat?! Nawmally good!

This just in, Sportscenter ratings sink 100% after covering their 30th straight hour on A-Rod's personal crisis.

6. Derek Jeter: LOL Hockey sucks! Even though I won't last three minutes in an ice rink. I have no penis.
by Smart American Male May 3, 2009
mugGet the MLB mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email