When a middle aged golfer gets drunk on the course and attempts to pick up on the cart girl, even though he is married. He tosses down a few White Claws and some awful lines that didn't even work 10 years prior thinking he has a chance to get up in her britches.
Holy shit, Trudie was the cart girl today and Dane asked her if she'd ever seen a lefty "drive it that hard". Jesus, Stranger Dane-ger
by Scotty Nice November 05, 2019
Get the Stranger Dane-ger mug.When you see someone hitting a golf ball and you feel bad for them because you assume they have prosthetic legs. Their ability to flex and move their lower extremities is so bad that you imagine they were hit by a train as a child or had polio because their parents were anti-vaxxers.
So I was watching this guy tee off the other day and I felt so sad thinking of what happened to them as a child. Then I watched them walk away and it was perfectly normal. He was stiff as a ball hitting a golf shot, but walked fine. Really bizarre, must be at least a 10 handicap without an actual handicap.
by Scotty Nice July 27, 2023
Get the Stiff as a Ball mug.When a man is able to achieve his three greatest pleasures in one sitting by reading a Stephen King novel, playing online cribbage and having your butthole filled with man mayo.
I was talking to my buddy and learned he loves three things - reading Stephen King novels, playing cribbage and getting butt fucked. He then proceeded to tell me for some reason that after he got home one night and his family was out of town, he picked up and started to read Christine by Stephen King, played online cribbage and then had a male prostitute given him a prostate exam with his erect wiener. He succeeded in getting Christine's cum filled Cribbage. Wild stuff.
by Scotty Nice October 18, 2023
Get the Christine's cum filled Cribbage mug.Trudie and Lizzy were out last night and met another girl. They took her home and they all did a trisser and came in unison.
by Scotty Nice January 16, 2020
Get the trisser mug.When your wife is shitfaced and you want some trim, so as soon as you get in the house you race upstairs in order to get some before she passes out. With boots, jeans and undies flying all over you lay into it before she goes catatonic.
Trudie and I were out drinking last night and she got so shitfaced I had to pull the Speed Racer Yard Sale before she passed out. She didn't remember it the next morning and wondered why our room looked like a skiing accident.
by Scotty Nice December 11, 2019
Get the Speed Racer Yard Sale mug.When you invite a gay midget to Thanksgiving and indicate which guest’s dick he’s supposed to suck by placing a lit votive under the chair of said “getter” of the fellatio.
I had the weirdest thanksgiving experience yesterday. There was a game called Turkey Day votive and basically they hired a midget to suck a random guest’s dick. It was crazy but I really enjoyed the BJ.
by Scotty Nice November 28, 2024
Get the Turkey day votive mug.When your older male friend can no longer see out of his left eye because of receiving a high speed shot of ejaculate directly to his eyeball during his sexual experimentation days. The eye survives for several years until the effect of the impact makes it such that glasses can no longer serve a beneficial purpose.
Damn I got a hummer from that MILF Trudie last night and I'd been saving up my load all week. She didn't want to swallow so when I was about to finish I blasted my goo so hard at her eye I doubt she will be able to see in a few years. She gonna have that Lopey Left Eye.
by Scotty Nice May 16, 2023
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