1 definition by RainmakerNY

Top Definition
Typical example of a small post-industrial wasteland town in upstate NY. As usual in the Hudson Valley region, their claim to fame is the long-forgotten era in which steam trains serviced the area. The symbol of the town is a romanticized depiction of a steam train running beside the town and most of their commemorative signs reference railroad tracks, railway bridges and old mule canals that were (yes, you guessed it) converted to railroad tracks.

The population is shielded from surrounding areas despite being a crossroads between three states. Most people have never been to NYC and there are some that barely visit neighboring towns.

Stores are essentially nonexistent, and the grimaces you receive when visiting the few remaining ones leave no mystery as to why this is. If you're not some longtime resident of 30 years, generally the response is one of suspicion and fear. Barring a Rite Aid and deficient Sav-A-Lot, the town is barren. There are a couple of quaint places to get ice cream if that outdated 1950s family atmosphere is desired.

The judicial system is corrupt, with two judges who also function as private attorneys complete with websites soliciting business and all. So unless you pay one to represent you in front of the other, there is automatic bias. The police are typical of a bad neighborhood, always constantly suspecting everyone under 60 years old of wrongdoing.
Car driver: "Let's stop off and get some gas and food at this exit, says 'Port Jervis'"

Passenger: "Google says all the gas, food and shopping for this exit is in Montague, NJ and showing really nothing toward this Port Jervis place."
by RainmakerNY December 26, 2018

Mug icon
Buy a Port Jervis mug!