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Prem Shah's definitions

Cider

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The most wonderful thing to have ever been created from an apple.

Bittersweet apple juice fermented and then drunk, particularly in the summertime.

Get's you off your face quicker than beer.
Not gassy at all, so very easy to drink.
The best brands are Strongbow and Magners.
Makes beer taste like a tramp's scrotum.

The good Lord made apples for one reason - CIDER.
"When i die, i want to be embalmed in cider."

"Pint of Strongbow please, mate"

"Magners with ice please, mate"

I F###ING LOVE CIDER...!!!
by Prem Shah September 18, 2006
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eBay

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A place where you buy things you never thought you'd need.

A place where you sell things you never thought you could.
"what should i do with this snot-filled tissue?"
"why not sell it on ebay, last one went for £20"
"well, f*** me!"
by Prem Shah September 14, 2006
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mow the lawn

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to 'mow the lawn' can also mean to take a dump.
not sure where this originated from, but have heard it a few times in London.
"i say, shall we go forth and partake in the quest for punani?"
"yeah mate, but give me five minutes to mow the lawn first..."
by Prem Shah September 14, 2006
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Iraq war

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A great idea that led to lots of fun for the US and UK soldiers.
Managed to whoop Saddam's ass and find him hiding in a hole.
For some stupid reason most Brits were against to war, blaming the lie about WMDs. Presumably they'd have preferred Saddam still there and his sons raping the women and children of Iraq as they did. I dispair at my country sometimes...
"why are you angry at the government?"
"THE IRAQ WAR"
"what about it?"
"it was illegal and wrong" (just saying what everyone else does)
"what, so you would have been happier with saddam still in power and the people of Iraq living a shit life, then?"
"errrr....oh.....uhmmmm.....i'm a thick shit aren't I?"
"Yes"
by Prem Shah September 14, 2006
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UFC

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Ultimate Fighting Championship

Bunch of hard-nuts get into an octagon shaped cage and knock the living shit out of each other. Elbows, knees to face, you name it.

No throat, eye or back of head strikes.

Different to eg K-1 as ground-work and submission techniques are also used.

The best knockouts ever, and the most testosterone flying around.

Most fighters come in classified as MMA (Mixed Martial Arts), although many are from Jiu-Jitsu.

Argueably the future of full-contact fighting.

Makes boxing look gay.
"Hi, Jeff? It's Bob. Me and my boyfriend are going to go watch the boxing - wanna cum?"

"No, Fuck off. I'm staying in with a few cans to watch the UFC, bitch"
by Prem Shah September 6, 2006
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ELVIS

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The king, jumpsuits, style icon

Brought blues to the masses then developed his own sound

Whether you admit it or not, all pop/rock musicians are disciples of elvis

Got fat and stupid at the end, and turned into a bumbling bafoon.

Died while having a dump and fell forwards, was found with his arse in the air, and a turd in the bowl.

At his best in the 68 comeback special.
"Hey, I Like Your Goblin Fancy Dress Outfit!!

"Thanks, It Is Rather Elvish"
by Prem Shah September 6, 2006
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ben chod

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Sister Fucker
Word of Indian origin. Tends to be more frequently used than the 'mother-fucker' equivalent.
It's up there as one of the top insults to people from the Indian sub-continent.
That ben chod over there tried to steal my pint.

Oi, ben chod, kiss my chadees!

I went to the bar to buy a pint and the ben chod asked me for I.D.
by Prem Shah August 25, 2006
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