Monkey's Dad's definitions
He sanitized his hands after touching any item, even if it had been sitting undisturbed on his desk for years. 'You can never be too careful', he said aloud, every few minutes, in denial of his isopropyl alcoholism.
by Monkey's Dad April 25, 2020
Get the isopropyl alcoholism mug.In a defiant act of masturetribution she gave herself a dozen orgasms, listening to him sleep, feeling it served him right for giving her the cold shoulder all week.
by Monkey's Dad March 12, 2020
Get the masturetribution mug.A long-time tactic employed in police interrogation, to force a suspect to drop his guard and open up. Now, a duality threatening the fabric of American social justice.
Standing in a line of peaceful protestors seeking acknowledgment of racial injustice, unsure as to whether the well-armed men before him would protect him or attack him, he saw clearly - the good cop bad cop routine had taken to the streets.
by Monkey's Dad June 13, 2020
Get the good cop bad cop mug.by Monkey's Dad April 24, 2020
Get the Hydroxycloroxquine mug.Chronicling the transformations of the world, from its creation to its breakdown, due to the coronavirus and the self-deification a Julius Caesar wannabe, Covid's Metamorphoses will be read in the 22nd Century as a charming fable of humanity as it once was.
by Monkey's Dad October 7, 2020
Get the Covid's Metamorphoses mug.Not the eternal 'you'll-burn-in-hell' admonition from parents, nuns and priests received by millions of adolescents. Now, it's your face that is the forbidden body part.
Quietly closing the door behind her, stripping off her gloves, sliding out of her mask, she kept repeating "Don't touch yourself" although she desperately craved the feel of her own fingers.
by Monkey's Dad May 15, 2020
Get the Don't touch yourself mug.She felt the weight of her uncertain future, more than ever, unable to predict or imagine the world which awaited.
by Monkey's Dad May 12, 2020
Get the uncertain future mug.