Mike and Mike the Accountants 's definitions

easter egg cunt

When a man attends Easter Sunday mass, (most often against his will by force of family, significant other etc.) he will quickly become incredibly disinterested and will look elsewhere to pass the time. It is at this moment that he realizes all the female parishioners dressing in their " Easter Sunday best" (i.e. dressing as promiscuously as possible despite the irony of attending church). It is important to note that this is one of the first times all year where the temperature permits the wearing of scantily clad clothing. After this phenomenon has been noted by the male, he will then begin to seek out the best looking women among the parish whom are dressed slutty as fuck, and begin to daydream about fucking the shit out of them. It is by this, and only this process, that the man is able to maintain his sanity during the mass. In some cases, the male might even take mental images for his spank bank.

Mike 1: Easter's coming up man, my lady's gonna make me go to church. Shit.

Mike 2: At least you have the easter egg cunt to look forward to!

by Mike and Mike the Accountants April 14, 2017

cuntusion

Often following intercourse with a large African American mule pecker or a large member in general, this is a term denoting vaginal soreness or discomfort post-coitus. Cuntusion can also be spawned from very rough sex or lack of adequate lubrication. Following a cuntision, it is recommended that the vaginal area receive 3-4 days of rest, although this does not preclude external vulva play. To expedite the healing process, it is recommended that the female stay at least 50 feet from large African American males. Symptoms include swelling, soreness, chafing and discomfort while urinating.

Mike 1: Yo did you see the latest Sixers draft pick?

Mike 2: Yea man, he looks like a guy that would give my lady a serious cuntusion.

by Mike and Mike the Accountants March 31, 2017