1 definition by Midwest Transplant

Sub species of river roach, in the megawhore family. Just like a river roach, the river whale can be found floating on America's waterways in summertime, sleeping with anything with three legs. However, the river whale does not need an innertube or raft, as she is so morbidly obese as to act as her own buoy. May be found in bikini tops 4 sizes too small.
Datum, look at the water glistening off that river whale. Hope she doesn't run aground in the shallows!
by Midwest Transplant July 7, 2018
Get the river whale mug.