Skip to main content

Maxwell Dope's definitions

THE SALAD GLOVE®

Share definition
(noun) a glove, developed by the band Andrew Jackson Jihad, that is used to eat salad whilst avoiding dangerous forks and messy cleanups
(noun) a useful eating utensil that is latex-free and one-size-fits-all
(noun) an easy and clean tool that enables you to FIST FUCK YOUR HUNGER™
(noun) that shit you can buy that, along with your iPod, you can sell to Bookmans when your wife dies and you lose your job (from the song People II: Still Peoplin' by Andrew Jackson Jihad)
**Tuesday 1:30pm - Two young men are sitting in a corner booth at Denny's - Max is frustrated with his Caesar salad**

Max: I know I'm being a bitch, but don't you think eating croutons with a fork is next to impossible and fucking annoying?
Tim: Dude, you need THE SALAD GLOVE®.
by Maxwell Dope November 14, 2013
Flag
mugGet the THE SALAD GLOVE® mug.

the salad glove

Share definition
(noun) a glove, developed by the band Andrew Jackson Jihad, that is used to eat salad whilst avoiding dangerous forks and messy cleanups

(noun) a useful eating utensil that is latex-free and one-size-fits-all

(noun) an easy and clean tool that enables you to FIST FUCK YOUR HUNGER™

(noun) that shit you can buy that, along with your iPod, you can sell to Bookmans when your wife dies and you lose your job (from the song People II: Still Peoplin' by Andrew Jackson Jihad)
**Tuesday 1:30pm - Two young men are sitting in a corner booth at Denny's - Max is frustrated with his Caesar salad**

Max: I know I'm being a bitch, but don't you think eating croutons with a fork is next to impossible and fucking annoying?
Tim: Dude, you need THE SALAD GLOVE®.
by Maxwell Dope November 14, 2013
Flag
mugGet the the salad glove mug.

banana code

Share definition
(verb) to use 4011 at a self-service checkout machine to weigh out more expensive items at the going rate of bananas (typically $0.59/lb in 2013, future readers must adjust accordingly for inflation)

(noun) the PLU (product look-up) code for bananas; (noun) the number 4011 that a shopper must use to weigh bananas in the self-service checkout aisle
**At Walmart using self-service checkout machine**

Max: Fuck, this beef jerky is pricey!
Tim: Just banana code it.
Max: Just huh?
Tim: Give it here.

**Frustrated, Tim grabs the beef jerky, places it on the scanner, clicks produce, types in 4011, then throws it in the bag**

Max: What the?!
Tim: You've honestly never banana coded? Were you born yesterday?
Max: So my jerky is only 33 cents?!
Tim: (unimpressed) Yeah.
by Maxwell Dope November 13, 2013
Flag
mugGet the banana code mug.

banana coded

Share definition
(verb) past tense version of banana code; (verb) to have previously used 4011 at a self-service checkout machine to weigh out more expensive items at the going rate of bananas (typically $0.59/lb in 2013, future readers must adjust accordingly for inflation)
**At Walmart using self-service checkout machine**

Max: Fuck, this beef jerky is pricey!
Tim: Just banana code it.
Max: Just huh?
Tim: Give it here.

**Frustrated, Tim grabs the beef jerky, places it on the scanner, clicks produce, types in 4011, then throws it in the bag**

Max: What the?!
Tim: You've honestly never banana coded? Were you born yesterday?
Max: So my jerky is only 33 cents?!
Tim: (unimpressed) Yeah.
by Maxwell Dope November 13, 2013
Flag
mugGet the banana coded mug.

wifey from another lifey

Share definition
(noun) a woman who could have been your perfect match if circumstances were different/more ideal
**Inside Trader Joe's - Breakfast Aisle - Friday 5:45pm**

Max: Whaddya think, Tim? Organic Cinnamon Spice Oatmeal or Fat Free Blueberry Muesli?
Tim: Go with the Muesli. Oh shit! 6 o'clock by the avos. Don't look now...

**Max peers sneakily over his shoulder at an elegantly dressed woman inspecting the heirloom tomatoes**

Max: Damn. If I wasn't dating Ashlee and I actually had my shit together, I'd be all over that.
Tim: Hashtag wifey from another lifey!
Max: Seriously!
Tim: We need to get jobs...
by Maxwell Dope November 12, 2013
Flag
mugGet the wifey from another lifey mug.

drop a Mick

Share definition
(verb) to take a trip late at night to a shitty fast food restaurant because nothing better is open; (verb) to go on a McRun
Max: Tim, you hungry?
Tim: Yeah, but nothing's open.
Max: Wanna drop a Mick?
Tim: Yeah, a McRun actually sounds pretty good right now.
Max: McDonalds or Taco Bell?
Tim: Micky D's. Taco Bell always gives me the McRuns!
by Maxwell Dope November 11, 2013
Flag
mugGet the drop a Mick mug.

the McRuns

Share definition
The medical condition known by doctors as diarrhea which comes as a direct result of a late-night McRun.
Max: Holy shit Tim! We shouldn't have gone on that McRun last night!

Tim: What's the matter?

Max: That McRun gave me a NASTY case of the McRuns!!
by Maxwell Dope November 9, 2013
Flag
mugGet the the McRuns mug.