crusty pants

Jocular term for a derelict, wineo, street person, or others not known for impeccable hygiene--a bum. These people never remove their trousers, because they are so infested with vermin and microbes that they might wander off by themselves, leaving the bum naked. Few things are more frightning than encountering an empty pair of animated pantaloons in a dark alley. And no, I've not been drinking.

Upright Citizen#1:"Who's that crusty pants waving at us?"
Upright Citizen#2:"That's just Mayson, the town drunk."
Upright Citizen#1:"But this is Los Angles."
Upright Citizen#2:"He always was ambitious."

by Kieran Le Petomaine November 16, 2006

zip your soup-cooler

Imperative command meaning "Shut your mouth", "Let's hear no more from you", or simply "Shut the fuck up". Often said to Negroes, Hebrews, Frenchmen, and others known to make slurping noises whilst eating soup.

1)Deputy Bubba Beernut:"Zip your soup-cooler, Sambo, I'll take no sass from you!"
2)American to French waiter:"Zip your soup cooler, Pierre, I don't want snails. Bring me a hamburger, and be quick about it."

by Kieran Le Petomaine November 13, 2006

slick as snot on a doorknob

Very slick indeed.
Phrase used to convey:
1)A sense of elegant suavity
2)A smooth, dashing je ne sais quoi
3)Class coming out ones' ass

Impressed Socialite #1:"I say, did you see how William butt-fucked that bunny-rabbit without soiling his cummerbund or spilling his green tea?
Impressed Socialite #2:"Yes, he's as slick as snot on a doorknob."

by Kieran Le Petomaine November 26, 2006