Dad: "Check out that naughty Mary Jane Rottenbox over there sleazing onto that guy."
Son: "Looks like a surfer to me - I think he's gonna pork her."
Dad: "Son, he's not gonna pork her."
Son: "Looks like a surfer to me - I think he's gonna pork her."
Dad: "Son, he's not gonna pork her."
by JT Amish March 18, 2011
Wife: "How did you enjoy that massage, sweetheart?"
Husband: "Sheeeeeeeit, the ending could have been happier."
Wife: "What the hell is your problem?"
Husband: "Girl I got a black belt in tae mofo, you dig?"
Husband: "Sheeeeeeeit, the ending could have been happier."
Wife: "What the hell is your problem?"
Husband: "Girl I got a black belt in tae mofo, you dig?"
by JT Amish April 10, 2010
The male ejaculate left floating in the tub or shower following masturbation, resembling the marine invertebrate. Generally non-poisonous.
"Dude, go ahead and use my shower but I know you haven't been laid for a while. I better not find any fresh-water jellyfish in there later."
"I would never do such a thing, mate. I'm offended you would suggest it... Any baby oil in the medicine cabinet?"
"I would never do such a thing, mate. I'm offended you would suggest it... Any baby oil in the medicine cabinet?"
by JT Amish December 15, 2009
Dude, watching 3 hours of porn online will use one giggitybyte of your monthly internet allowance.... (crickets chirping) Uhhh, according to my cousin.
by JT Amish April 29, 2011
BOMB represents the acronym for "Beat Off Mental Bank." In other words, the images u have in your mind for inspiration during masturbation.
(Two friends at a pub having a drink & checking out the ladies)
Guy #1: "Check out that girl over there in the black shirt."
Guy #2: "Already in my BOMB file, dude."
Guy #1: "Check out that girl over there in the black shirt."
Guy #2: "Already in my BOMB file, dude."
by JT Amish August 09, 2009
A cougar you meet outdoors (100% organic) or in a setting that otherwise does not restrict her movement, as opposed to one you meet in a club or at a bar (ie - a "cougar conservation park").
"I'm sick of the same old cougars we see at happy hour - they come with so much baggage and seem so desperate. Meeting one while hiking or at the beach is the better move. That's where the sexy, healthy free-range cougars are."
by JT Amish August 02, 2009
The organic beverage made with one single ingredient*: male sperm.
*Gay body builders have been known to add various protein supplements such as creatine or whey (not that there's anything wrong with this).
*Gay body builders have been known to add various protein supplements such as creatine or whey (not that there's anything wrong with this).
KPM: "Dude you'll know if she's naughty or not by whether she'll swallow the DNA Smoothie."
JT: "Oh yeah? What if she spits it out?"
KPM: "Never had that happen dude. Sorry, no advice."
JT: "Oh yeah? What if she spits it out?"
KPM: "Never had that happen dude. Sorry, no advice."
by JT Amish December 15, 2009