Definitions by JL Patrick

Roller Coaster 

A girl to whom height is important.

Girl 1: "Look at that guy over there; he's so cute!"

Girl 2: "He's too short for me. You have to be over 6 feet for this ride."

Girl 1: "Ah, you're a roller coaster. I guess your carny greased you up for nothing tonight. He's all mine!"

Roller Coaster by JL Patrick January 25, 2014

NPS Experience 

Near Pants Shitting Experience

An event that scares you so badly you almost shit your pants.

The other night, I had an NPS experience when my car slid on a patch of ice going into a tunnel.

NPS Experience by JL Patrick March 21, 2013

touchebag 

Also known as a hipster. As self-righteous as a douchebag, but they think they are witty.

See that guy over there with the women's pants, choppy haircut, and non-prescription coke-bottle glasses?

I didn't even think that was a guy until I saw the dirty beard and ironic mustache.

Yeah. He had to special order that flannel. Everyone knows anorexic lumberjacks don't exist. He's a real touchebag.

touchebag by JL Patrick November 28, 2011

transaction 

The sex you get from a crossdresser.

Man, that girl I met at the bar last night was really a dude. It's okay, I got me some sweet transaction.

transaction by JL Patrick April 7, 2008

cuntankerous 

Bitchedly ill-tempered and quarrelsome.

My girl wouldn't stop bustin' my chops about some pair of panties she found in my back seat. What a cuntankerous hoe.

cuntankerous by JL Patrick April 7, 2008