Skip to main content

Frank Fontain's definitions

Fudge knuckle

When you have uncontrollable rectal leaking and it ends up all over your testicles and inner thighs. You reach down to check what has happened and your hands and knuckles get covered in the devils fudge.
Phil : I am so embarrassed, i ate a dodgy vindaloo last night and it has played havoc with my nether regions.

Damo : how could you tell what had happened?

Phil : i reached down to check and ended up with a bloody fudge knuckle !
Damo : i have to go now, i think i left the iron on....
by Frank Fontain June 15, 2019
mugGet the Fudge knucklemug.

The polish door hinge

Typically involves a lady of larger stature and a thick polish sausage along with a can do attitude. Strip the larger lass down naked and lay her flat on her back. Gently warm the sausage in a microwave, now insert the sausage into the vagina for a period until orgasm is almost reached then at that moment jam the sausage right up the anus. Her legs will slam shut like a well oiled door hinge. The element of surprise is a must and it is advised to be wearing sneakers as you may require a quick getaway. If you do want to eat the sausage later a condom is recommended.
Peter: have you see that girl down at the local deli?
Frank: do you mean the plus sized girl?
Peter: yeah thats her, we got into a bit on friday night and i gave her the polish door hinge!
Frank: was that polish sausage and cheese sandwiches you made us for lunch??
Peter: ummmmm yeah...
by Frank Fontain May 23, 2019
mugGet the The polish door hingemug.

poo shoe

This is not to replace a traditional shoe but more of a flesh shoe. Now you will need a drunken person to lay flat on the floor face down, and spread the buttucks. The drunken person is to relax as this can be quite painful, now gently work each toe inside the anus one by one until you have all toes inside. Proceed deeper until the whole foot is inside the anus and the persons anus resembles a shoe on your foot. It is not uncommon to hear "do these come in a size 9? " or " does this shoe come in black?"
At this point it is best not to jusge either party in this act , as you should never judge a person til you have walked a mile in their shoes.
Brian: i can never find a shoe that fits right

Craig : have you tried on a poo shoe?
Brian: no but i would love to wear one...
Craig: i will go get the vodka....
by Frank Fontain April 19, 2019
mugGet the poo shoemug.

Kermit the flog

This act involves traditionally a large green frog, if unavailable any old frog or toad will do. First hold the frog in one hand and as you squeeze it the mouth will open creating a vessel for your spunk. Now jack off vigorously until the point of ejaculation, aim and shoot your hot load into kermits mouth. Hence the title Kermit the flog.
Brendon: aha ! I have caught myself another green tree frog.

Jack: What will you do with it Brendon?
Brendon: Stand back and watch me kermit the flog this little fella !
Jack: i hope its female !
Brendon: i dont...
by Frank Fontain April 16, 2019
mugGet the Kermit the flogmug.

Jacuzzi butt boost

One pantless person does a hand stand against a wall. Prior to the hand stand rectal stretching is needed to create an anal cavity. Once in the hand stand position a friend fills the cavity with any brand of energy drink. A fart is required to produce a jacuzzi effect while the friend drinks the energy drink through a straw out of the anal cavity.
Phil :Boy oh boy am i tired ! I really need a boost.

Brian : fancy a jacuzzi butt boost?
by Frank Fontain April 9, 2019
mugGet the Jacuzzi butt boostmug.

The Vac truck

THE VAC TRUCK
3 nude males release bodily fluids into a large mixing bowl. The first person defecates, the second urinates and the third ejaculates. Now here is the fun part! To decide who vacuums the up the waste three players get nude and whoever has the shortest penis is the loser and must suck up the contents of the mixing bowl using a short length of rubber hose. Engine noises are a must whilst performing this most degrading act.
Jason: Hey Ken and Brendon i have a brand new mixing bowl, would you two like to perform the vac truck?

Ken: ok, why not?

Brendon: as long as it doesn't involve dick measuring comp....
by Frank Fontain June 12, 2019
mugGet the The Vac truckmug.

Bildo

When you can't find your dildo and you end up using your neighbours (Bill) fist.
Knock knock....
Amy: You home Bill?
Bill: Oh hi Amy what can I get you? A cup of sugar?
Amy: Ummmmm just wanted to know if I could borrow your Bildo
Bill: OK no worries, I have a pie in the oven so you can only borrow it for about 10 mins
by Frank Fontain November 26, 2020
mugGet the Bildomug.

Share this definition