Definitions by Dumu The Void

Theory of Secret Logic

The belief that there is a hidden, coherent logic behind seemingly irrational systems, events, or behaviors, and that understanding this secret logic would reveal that everything actually makes sense—just not in the way obvious to casual observers. Proponents of the theory of secret logic argue that conspiracy theorists aren't wrong; they're just using a different logical framework, one that connects dots that mainstream logic refuses to see. The theory is popular among people who find the universe too chaotic to bear and need to believe that behind the randomness, there's a pattern—even if that pattern is malevolent, absurd, or designed by aliens who really care about our crop circles.

Example: "He subscribed to the theory of secret logic, believing that every government action, no matter how incompetent, was part of a master plan. When a bridge collapsed due to neglected maintenance, he saw not incompetence but a deliberate plot to justify infrastructure spending. The secret logic was always more interesting than the boring truth, and also completely made up."

Theory of Secret Logic by Dumu The Void February 15, 2026

Fallacy of Arbitrary Factuality

The error of declaring certain claims to be facts and others to be false based on nothing but personal preference or tribal allegiance, ignoring evidence, expertise, and consistency. This fallacy is how someone can believe that vaccines are dangerous despite overwhelming scientific consensus, or that an election was stolen despite dozens of court cases and audits. Facts become a la carte: you pick what's true based on what feels good, what your team believes, or what serves your interests. The fallacy of arbitrary factuality is the death of shared reality, because if facts are just whatever you want them to be, then we're not having a conversation—we're just yelling at each other from different dimensions.

Example: "She committed the fallacy of arbitrary factuality in the group chat, declaring that a viral TikTok was 'facts' while dismissing a peer-reviewed study as 'just someone's opinion.' When asked why, she said the study 'felt wrong' and the TikTok 'felt right.' Facts, for her, were feelings, and reality was whatever she felt like believing."

Fallacy of Arbitrary Factuality by Dumu The Void February 15, 2026

Fallacy of Arbitrary Objectivity

The logical error of claiming that your perspective is objective while everyone else's is biased, without providing any justification for why your viewpoint deserves the "objective" label. This fallacy is the bedrock of punditry, editorial writing, and conversations with your uncle at Thanksgiving. The person committing it positions themselves as a neutral observer floating above the fray, while everyone else is mired in ideology, emotion, or self-interest. The reality, of course, is that they're just as biased as everyone else—they've just declared their bias to be the center of the universe, which is a very convenient way to never have to examine your own assumptions.

Example: "The pundit committed the fallacy of arbitrary objectivity daily, presenting his conservative opinions as 'common sense' and 'what most Americans think' while describing liberal views as 'ideological' and 'out of touch.' He genuinely believed he was objective, which was the most objective sign that he wasn't."

Fallacy of Arbitrary Objectivity by Dumu The Void February 15, 2026

Arbitrary Fallacy

The meta-fallacy of committing a fallacy simply because you've decided that logic doesn't apply to you, your argument, or your preferred conclusions. It's the rhetorical equivalent of playing chess and declaring that your pieces can move however you want because you've decided the rules are arbitrary. The arbitrary fallacy encompasses all other fallacies, but with the added twist that the person committing it knows they're being illogical and simply doesn't care. They've decided that their truth is truer than your facts, their logic is logicaler than your logic, and no amount of reasoning will change their mind because reasoning is just, like, your opinion, man.

Example: "He committed the arbitrary fallacy in every debate. When presented with evidence, he said evidence was unreliable. When presented with logic, he said logic was a Western construct. When asked what he would accept, he said 'common sense,' which meant whatever he already believed. There was no way to win, because he had declared the game rigged and was playing by his own rules, which changed constantly."

Arbitrary Fallacy by Dumu The Void February 15, 2026

Arbitrary Non-Correlation Fallacy

A common online debating tactic where someone dismisses a valid connection between two things by arbitrarily declaring them unrelated, often without evidence or reasoning. For example, when you point out that billionaires exist alongside homelessness, and someone responds that "those things have nothing to do with each other"—as if wealth accumulation and poverty exist in separate universes. The arbitrary non-correlation fallacy is the rhetorical equivalent of covering your ears and saying "la la la not connected." It's especially popular in discussions about systemic issues, where acknowledging connections would require acknowledging problems, which is inconvenient when you're trying to defend the status quo.

Example: "She posted a graph showing that as CEO pay skyrocketed, worker wages stagnated. The first comment was pure arbitrary non-correlation fallacy: 'Those two things aren't related. CEO pay is about talent and markets. Worker wages are about productivity. Different things.' She posted five studies showing the connection. He posted 'correlation isn't causation.' She posted the causation studies. He posted 'still not convinced.' The fallacy had done its job: preventing learning, preserving ignorance."

Arbitrary Non-Correlation Fallacy by Dumu The Void February 15, 2026

Arbitrary Reality Fallacy

The logical error in which something is considered true or false based on arbitrary, often self-serving criteria rather than evidence or consistent standards. This fallacy is rampant in politics and economics, where the same person will demand "rigorous proof" for climate science while accepting election fraud claims based on a single Twitter post. Truth becomes a menu: you pick what you want to believe, and reality is just whatever supports your side. The arbitrary reality fallacy is how people can look at the same economy and one sees booming success while another sees crushing failure—both are looking, neither is using a consistent measuring stick, and both are convinced the other is delusional.

Example: "He used the arbitrary reality fallacy in every argument. When she cited unemployment statistics, he said government data was fake. When she cited private research, he said it was biased. When she cited his own previous statements, he said he'd been misquoted. Reality, for him, was whatever allowed him to win the argument. She stopped arguing, because you can't debate someone who brings their own facts and changes them as needed."

Arbitrary Reality Fallacy by Dumu The Void February 15, 2026

Arbitrary Obsolescence Fallacy

The claim that socialism and communism are outdated ideologies from the 19th century, while capitalism is presented as timeless, natural, and permanently relevant—despite capitalism also being a 19th-century ideology that has changed dramatically over time. This fallacy arbitrarily declares one set of ideas expired while granting another eternal freshness, based on nothing but preference. It's like saying horses are outdated but cars are forever, ignoring that cars will also be obsolete someday, and that the criteria for "outdated" are entirely made up. The arbitrary obsolescence fallacy allows capitalism's defenders to avoid engaging with socialist critiques by simply declaring them old, as if age determined validity rather than, you know, evidence and argument.

*Example: "In the debate, he deployed the arbitrary obsolescence fallacy: 'Socialism is a 19th-century idea that failed everywhere it was tried. Capitalism is modern, dynamic, the future.' She pointed out that capitalism was also a 19th-century idea, that it had also failed many people, and that 'modern' was just a vibe, not an argument. He responded with 'but look at the stock market.' The fallacy held strong."*

Arbitrary Obsolescence Fallacy by Dumu The Void February 15, 2026