“Did you bang that bird you pulled last night?” “Nah mate, she was in the Jam shed so I just got a blozza and gave her a cream tea”
by Dirk shufflebum February 07, 2020
A rare mutation of the classic Cream Tea. This involves the act of the tea bagging taking place on the toilet (throne). The bagger must be stood on the seat, facing his partner, allowing for good dipping distance whilst the bag-ee is sat down. Bonus points are awarded for the act taking place beween second cousins.
“Ach, it got out hand at the wedding party last night, I ended up giving Naomi a Royal Cream Tea in the portaloos.”
“Your cousin Naomi?”
“Aye, probably one too many Jaegers, but at least thats ticked off now.”
“Your cousin Naomi?”
“Aye, probably one too many Jaegers, but at least thats ticked off now.”
by Dirk shufflebum March 19, 2025
Derivation of Monkey Face - a female wipes period blood on the face of her partner during cunnilingus and then proceeds to stick pubic hair to said partner’s face using the blood as a rudimentary adhesive.
“Christ, when I glanced in the mirror I looked like a badly beaten up Bee-Gee but it turns out Sharon had just given me a sly jammy monkey”
by Dirk shufflebum February 07, 2024