Saint Sebastian

An early Christian saint and martyr (died c. 288). The Roman emperor Diocletian had Sebastian shot full of arrows. When this failed to kill him, and he continued to be critical of Diocletian, the emperor had him clubbed to death.
EXAMPLE:

' Mary Alice was smiling at a picture of Saint Sebastian, by the Spanish painter El Greco . . . Saint Sebastian was a Roman soldier who had lived seventeen hundred years before . . . He had secretly become a Christian when Christianity was against the law.

' And somebody squealed on him. The Emperor Diocletian had him shot by archers. The picture Mary Alice smiled at with such uncritical bliss showed a human being who was so full of arrows that he looked like a porcupine.

'Something almost nobody knew about Saint Sebastian, incidentally, since painters liked to put so many arrows into him, was that he survived the incident. He actually got well.

' He walked about Rome praising Christianity and bad-mouthing the Emperor, so he was sentenced to death a second time. He was beaten to death by rods.

' And so on. '

--- 1973. KURT VONNEGUT. "Breakfast of Champions, or, Goodbye Blue Monday." Chapter 19 (Pages 217 - 218).
by Dinkum February 22, 2014
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twerp

According to Kurt Vonnegut, a twerp is a guy who:

(1) sticks a set of false teeth up his butt and bites the buttons off the back seats of taxicabs. (Not to be confused with a "snarf");
(2) hasn't read either Ambrose Bierce's "Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge" or Alexis de Tocqueville's "Democracy in America".
"Do you know what a twerp is? When I was in Shortridge High School in Indianapolis 65 years ago, a twerp was a guy who stuck a set of false teeth up his butt and bit the buttons off the back seats of taxicabs. (And a snarf was a guy who sniffed the seats of girls' bicycles.)

"And I consider anybody a twerp who hasn't read the greatest American short story, which is "Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge", by Ambrose Bierce. . . . It is a flawless example of American genius, like "Sophisticated Lady" by Duke Ellington or the Franklin stove.

"I consider anybody a twerp who hasn't read "Democracy in America" by Alexis de Tocqueville. There can never be a better book than that one on the strengths and vulnerabilities inherent in our form of government."

-- Kurt Vonnegut, in "A Man Without a Country".
by Dinkum July 08, 2013
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rattlesnake

(1) ' n. Any of various poisonous American snakes, of genera Crotalus and Sistrurus, having a rattle at the end of its tail. ' -- Wiktionary

(2) According to Kurt Vonnegut, the rattlesnake is a creature so inimical to humankind that it makes you wonder about the vaunted benevolence of the Creator of the Universe.
EXAMPLE:

' Dwayne mimicked her cruelly in a falsetto voice . . . He looked about as pleasant and relaxed as a coiled rattlesnake now. It was his bad chemicals, of course, which were compelling him to look like that . . .

' The Creator of the Universe had put a rattle on its {the rattlesnake's} tail. The Creator had also given it front teeth which were hypodermic syringes filled with deadly poison.

' Sometimes I wonder about the Creator of the Universe. '

-- From Kurt Vonnegut's 1973 novel "Breakfast of Champions" -- Chapter 15 (page 159 - 160).
by Dinkum August 28, 2013
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Breakfast of Champions

(1) The trademarked slogan for the General Mills breakfast cereal "Wheaties", a product that has been marketed since 1924.

(2) The title of Kurt Vonnegut's 1973 novel "Breakfast of Champions, or Goodbye Blue Monday".

(3) A ironically humorous expression that is used to indicate a food or beverage that isn't very good for you.
EXAMPLE of senses (1) and (2) :

' The expression "Breakfast of Champions" is a registered trademark of General Mills, Inc., for use on a breakfast cereal product. The use of the identical expression as the title for this book is not intended to indicate an association with or sponsorship by General Mills, nor is it intended to disparage their fine products.'

-- Kurt Vonnegut, being ironical on page 1 of the Preface to his 1973 novel "Breakfast of Champions", a tongue-in-cheek admonition he repeats verbatim in Chapter 18 (on page 195).

EXAMPLE of sense (3):

' I now had Bonnie MacMahon, bring more yeast excrement to . . . Karabekian. Karabekian's drink was a Beefeater's dry martini with a twist of lemon peel, so Bonnie said to him, "Breakfast of Champions."

' "That's what you said when you brought me my first martini," said Karabekian.

' "I say that every time I give anybody a martini," said Bonnie.

' Doesn't that get tiresome?" said Karabekian. "Or maybe that's why people found cities in Godforsaken places like this -- so that they can make the same jokes over and over again, until the Bright Angel of Death stops their mouths with ashes."

' "I just try to cheer people up," said Bonnie. "If that's a crime, I never heard about it till now. I'll stop saying it from now on. I beg your pardon. I did not mean to give offense." '

-- From Kurt Vonnegut's 1973 novel "Breakfast of Champions", Chapter 19 (pages 208 - 211).
by Dinkum July 30, 2013
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Saint Anthony

A Christian saint from Egypt (ca. 251356). One of the "Desert Fathers," St. Anthony is considered by some to be "The Father of All Monks." The "temptation of Saint Anthony" has long been a favorite subject of Catholic art.
EXAMPLE:

' I made a . . . duplicate on my Formica tabletop of a painting by Rabo Karabekian, entitled "The Temptation of Saint Anthony."

' . . . I had Beatrice Keedsler say to Rabo Karabekian, "This is a dreadful confession, but I don't even know who Saint Anthony was. Who was he, and why should anybody have wanted to tempt him?"

' I don't know, and I would hate to find out," said Karabekian . . .

' . . . Saint Anthony, incidentally, was an Egyptian who founded the very first monastery, which was a place where men could live simple lives and pray often to the Creator of the Universe, without the distractions of ambition and sex and yeast excrement { Vonnegut's neologism for "alcohol" }. Saint Anthony himself sold everything he had when he was young, and he went out into the wilderness and lived alone for twenty years.

' He was often tempted during all those years of perfect solitude by visions of good times he might have had with food and men and women and children and the marketplace and so on. '

--- 1973. KURT VONNEGUT. "Breakfast of Champions, or, Goodbye Blue Monday."Chapter 19 (Pages 207, 209, 211 - 212).
by Dinkum February 22, 2014
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Coprolaliac

A person suffering from or subject to coprolalia, the obsessive and uncontrollable use of scatological language. (Compare with such like back-formations as insomnia and insomniac; hypochondria and hypochondriac; coprophagia and coprophagiac; coprophilia and coprophiliac).
The "jailin' it" droopy-drawers doofus was a COPROLALIAC: he suffered from "the Black man's disease", the utter inability to assemble even the simplest English sentence without lavishly larding his utterances with a plethora of "fuckers", "motherfuckers", "motherfucking", . . . and, well, you get the picture. It was almost as if "motherfucker" was the only word he knew and he was bound and determined to make the most of it -- as a noun, a verb, an adjective, an adverb, an imperative, and, of course, as an interjection! Yeah, good ol' Droopy Drawers, he's cheesin' it as he's sleazin' it -- he's a real kool kitty, a regular "copro-cat".
by Dinkum July 29, 2013
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Armistice Day

November 11, formerly observed in the United States in commemoration of the signing of the armistice ending World War I in 1918. Since 1954 it has been incorporated into the observances of Veterans Day.

-- American Heritage Dictionary, 4th Edition
EXAMPLE:

"So this book is a sidewalk strewn with junk, trash which I throw over my shoulders as I travel in time back to November eleventh, nineteen hundred and twenty-two.

"I will come to a time in my backwards trip when November eleventh, accidentally my birthday, was a sacred day called Armistice Day. When I was a boy . . . all the people of all the nations which had fought in the First World War were silent during the eleventh minute of the eleventh hour of Armistice Day, which was the eleventh day of the eleventh month.

"It was during that minute in nineteen hundred and eighteen, that millions upon millions of human beings stopped butchering one another. I have talked to old men who were on battlefields during that minute. They have told me in one way or another that the sudden silence was the voice of God. So we still have among us some men who can remember when God spoke clearly to mankind.

"Armistice Day has become Veterans' Day. Armistice Day was sacred. Veterans' Day is not.

"So I will throw Veterans' Day over my shoulder. Armistice Day I will keep. I don't want to throw away any sacred things.

"What else is sacred? Oh, "Romeo and Juliet", for instance.

"And all music is."

-- From Kurt Vonnegut's 1973 novel "Breakfast of Champions" -- Preface (page 6).
by Dinkum August 01, 2013
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