3 definitions by Die Fledermaus
A protocol designed to eliminate confusion when a phone call loses signal or is otherwise disrupted. Named after the person who created it.
The protocol is, whoever made the initial call is the one who calls back; the other doesn't attempt to reconnect. This eliminates those awkward moments when both parties try to reconnect at the same time.
The protocol is, whoever made the initial call is the one who calls back; the other doesn't attempt to reconnect. This eliminates those awkward moments when both parties try to reconnect at the same time.
"I lost you so I tried to call you back but I kept going straight to voicemail."
"You should have followed the Colasante Protocol.
"You should have followed the Colasante Protocol.
by Die Fledermaus August 23, 2019
Invented by the renowned social architect John Colasante, author of the Colasante Protocol (also on Urbandictionary.com), the Colasante Salutation (aka Okbye) is a way of expeditiously ending any call. as such it's a perfect bookend to the Colasante Protocol, which is about starting a call. This has especially become important since the pandemic, where it seems nobody seems to know how to say goodbye without dragging it out anymore.
The Colasante Salutation is quite simple: as soon as the conversation runs out of steam, you immediately say "Okbye", your partner reciprocates, and you both immediately hang up.
The Colasante Salutation is quite simple: as soon as the conversation runs out of steam, you immediately say "Okbye", your partner reciprocates, and you both immediately hang up.
Pre-Colasante Salutation:
A: ...well that's interesting.
B: ...
A: ...
B: Well I guess I should get back to work | the kids | whatever
A: Yeah, I've got a ton of stuff to do too....
B: Alright, I guess I'll see you soon then
A: Yeah, it was nice catching up
B: Yes it was. Well... talk to you later.
A: Sure, see you soon.
B: Ok, uh, bye
A: bye
A + B: >click<
Post-Colasante Salutation
A: ...well that's interesting.
B: ...
A: ...
B: Okbye
A: OKbye
A + B: >click<
A: ...well that's interesting.
B: ...
A: ...
B: Well I guess I should get back to work | the kids | whatever
A: Yeah, I've got a ton of stuff to do too....
B: Alright, I guess I'll see you soon then
A: Yeah, it was nice catching up
B: Yes it was. Well... talk to you later.
A: Sure, see you soon.
B: Ok, uh, bye
A: bye
A + B: >click<
Post-Colasante Salutation
A: ...well that's interesting.
B: ...
A: ...
B: Okbye
A: OKbye
A + B: >click<
by Die Fledermaus September 27, 2022
The logic whereby nothing you do is ever good or pure enough.
Named after the core example where someone can be on a diet and no matter how effective it is, there's always someone who will criticize some dietary choice you made, the logical conclusion being that the only way to prevent this from happening would be if all you ever ate was chard.
Happening more and more in left-leaning circles where people frequently criticize other people for not being "woke enough".
Named after the core example where someone can be on a diet and no matter how effective it is, there's always someone who will criticize some dietary choice you made, the logical conclusion being that the only way to prevent this from happening would be if all you ever ate was chard.
Happening more and more in left-leaning circles where people frequently criticize other people for not being "woke enough".
"I lost 50 pounds in 3 months!"
"oh but if you'd have cut rice out of your diet, it would be so much healthier."
"yeah, thanks for throwing the chard argument at me"
"oh but if you'd have cut rice out of your diet, it would be so much healthier."
"yeah, thanks for throwing the chard argument at me"
by Die Fledermaus August 23, 2019