CrispyJack's definitions

wifi car

Any vehicle that needlessly connects to wifi. These cars have updates like a computer. Customers may be forced to pay for a subscription service for basic features like heat, AC, listening to the radio, moving their seat backward/forward, etc. Pretty soon, steering privileges will be a subscription.

These new cars run off wifi instead of vacuum and stripper glitter. They don't make them like they used to.

Cybertruck owner : "OMG, did you know my new Tesla automatically changes steering sensitivity based on speed? "
Mopar owner: "Imagine buying a wifi car."

by CrispyJack February 26, 2024

liberal muzzle

A name for the face coverings people wear who still believe COVID-19 is a threat. Despite everyone else unmasked, they continue to insist on wearing masks in public, making it difficult for anyone to effectively communicate with them. Although their motives are unclear, it is suspected they belong to some sort of political echo chamber that has no concept of a benefit-risk analysis.

Person 1: Did you hear anything the professor said during lecture?
Person 2: No, they had their liberal muzzle on.

by CrispyJack February 20, 2023