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Craig McLaughlin's definitions

hairy

Undesirable young woman from Glasgow. Commonly (although not necessarily) from the schemes, usually fat and hacket with a perm. Can become worryingly attractive after the consumption of copious amounts of booze, with potentially alarming results.
Tam had a taste for adventure and knew the risks of landing a hairy in the sack during a night out in Paisley
by Craig McLaughlin December 15, 2008
mugGet the hairymug.

stoat the ba'

Scottish term for a child molester. Stoat is a verb meaning to hit hard and the ba' refers to a ball. Literally thump a football (soccer for you N American eejits). A stoater is something great, especially a goal in football.

How this relates to child abuse I'm not sure but that's what they call it. Stoat the ba's may be in danger of getting chibbed up Bar-L following conviction.
Irate parent to shifty looking character loitering at a playground:

"See you ya cunt, you some kinda Stoat the ba'? Beat it or I'll kick yer heid in!"
by Craig McLaughlin December 15, 2008
mugGet the stoat the ba'mug.

hairyholes

An exclamation, typically of surprise, accompanied by a look you would expect when taking a fit bird home, only to discover she has a pair of hairy holes.

In politer terms may be stated as 'You're joking!'
Jimmy - "Awright Boaby, saw yer Maw up the toon the day"
Boaby - "Fair play to you - whit wis she doin?"
Jimmy - "Having her flange waxed"
Boaby - "Hairyholes!"
by Craig McLaughlin December 14, 2008
mugGet the hairyholesmug.

Arabs

Other than the obvious....

Arabs are what the fans of Dundee United FC are known as. The nickname stems from their excessively sandy football (soccer) pitch, which in turn is due to their geology on the East coast of Scotland.

Fans will often dress for the occasion in a caricatured Westernised robe and headdress, although last time I checked abstention from alcohol was not part of the MO.
The 1994 Scottish Cup Final had the Arabs of Dundee partying all night long.
by Craig McLaughlin July 20, 2008
mugGet the Arabsmug.

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