BlueShiftGlazer's definitions
One. orange .monkey .friend. acronym "Oomf" was a , now defunct us army tactical deployable where , high ranking soldiers would be able to deploy an orange hued ape who would , in theory provide fire support , medical assistance, patrol, destroy entire enemy groupings, or in laymans terms " cool orange monkey kick major ass"
The theory was that if a monkey was painted orange using the right kind of chemical solution it would evolve and become highly aggresive yet intelligent and loyal , the connection to the color orange specifically came from dr oo-rang's belief that orange was the missing link to all evolution, it is unknown how he got so far with this theory as it is worth noting he had not so much as a phd but infact a little caesars voucher and no id. The entire project became a laughing stock and cost the us billions and caused lieutenant dan (no relation so dont ask) and sergeant hartman ( seriously no realtion do not ask) to commit suicide, which is commonly believed to of been a heavy impact in the US losing to vietnam,
The theory was that if a monkey was painted orange using the right kind of chemical solution it would evolve and become highly aggresive yet intelligent and loyal , the connection to the color orange specifically came from dr oo-rang's belief that orange was the missing link to all evolution, it is unknown how he got so far with this theory as it is worth noting he had not so much as a phd but infact a little caesars voucher and no id. The entire project became a laughing stock and cost the us billions and caused lieutenant dan (no relation so dont ask) and sergeant hartman ( seriously no realtion do not ask) to commit suicide, which is commonly believed to of been a heavy impact in the US losing to vietnam,
by BlueShiftGlazer March 15, 2026
Get the Oomf mug.The bestest most awesome game of all time "Half Life: Blue Shift" was , is an expansion pack for the legendary fps game "Half Life" in which you play as a kickass security guard called "Barney Calhoun" and do cool as fuck security guard stuff and shoot people and aliens and protect scientists! It is widely believed that this is canon and the backstory as to how Barney Calhoun in Half Life 2 came to be despite blue shift being developed by gearbox. It is worth mentioning Blue Shift is unique in how you , the protagonist are the only protag from a half life game to not get gman all up in your shit , this is because Barney is a fucking badass. The mod " Black mesa: Blue shift" is with mentioning as while not the offical blue shift it perfectly adapts what it was, is and was meant to be or what it could of been and helped people understand how kickass blue shift is
Blue shift enjoyer: man i love blue shift, the expansion pack for half life
Guy who is going to be shot: blue shift? More like blue shit!!!
Jesus: not cool dude.
Guy who is going to be shot: blue shift? More like blue shit!!!
Jesus: not cool dude.
by BlueShiftGlazer March 15, 2026
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