Definitions by Balki Bartokomouth
Water Board
1. A sex act in which a woman presses a towel over the face of her sexual partner, then ejaculates or "squirts" violently over the face and towel to simulate drowning.
2. A female ejaculation aimed or targeting the mouth, eyes, and lungs of a sexual partner.
2. A female ejaculation aimed or targeting the mouth, eyes, and lungs of a sexual partner.
Every time Brigette Nielsen gets her hands on a man, she straddles the poor bastard like a saddle and water boards the dude until he's gargling she-skeet.
Water Board by Balki Bartokomouth February 22, 2014
Johnny Appleseed
1. A sex act in which a man uses his thumbs to pack his testicles into an ass hole -- similarly to how one would pack a seed into the earth vis-à-vis the folk myth of Johnny Appleseed.
2. The "tea bagging" of a garden in an attempt to make it more fertile.
2. The "tea bagging" of a garden in an attempt to make it more fertile.
Richard Gere wouldn't have made such a name for himself if Pauly Shore had given him a Johnny Appleseed instead of that poor gerbil.
Johnny Appleseed by Balki Bartokomouth September 6, 2013