AllegedlyAllegedly's definitions
(noun / verb / masterclass in zero consequences)
1. A walking indictment of the system. When someone drinks, drives, obliterates a coworker’s car, injures them, runs from the scene, gets arrested later, shows up on the evening news… and somehow keeps their job like they just missed a staff meeting.
2. The ultimate “rules are for other people” speed-run. A flawless execution of criminal stupidity paired with god-tier immunity.
3. (verb) To Almeida a situation – to stack felonies, lawsuits, and headlines, then stroll back into work untouched while everyone else wonders why they even try to be decent humans.
1. A walking indictment of the system. When someone drinks, drives, obliterates a coworker’s car, injures them, runs from the scene, gets arrested later, shows up on the evening news… and somehow keeps their job like they just missed a staff meeting.
2. The ultimate “rules are for other people” speed-run. A flawless execution of criminal stupidity paired with god-tier immunity.
3. (verb) To Almeida a situation – to stack felonies, lawsuits, and headlines, then stroll back into work untouched while everyone else wonders why they even try to be decent humans.
Example sentences:
“That wasn’t an accident — that was an Almeida.”
“If I did one-tenth of that, I’d be unemployed, bankrupt, and shunned. She Almeida’d it and got benefits.”
“HR watched the mugshot, shrugged, and said ‘she’s still good.’ Legendary Almeida behavior.”
“That wasn’t an accident — that was an Almeida.”
“If I did one-tenth of that, I’d be unemployed, bankrupt, and shunned. She Almeida’d it and got benefits.”
“HR watched the mugshot, shrugged, and said ‘she’s still good.’ Legendary Almeida behavior.”
by AllegedlyAllegedly December 23, 2025
Get the Almeida mug.