Definitions by Abzugal
Washingtonology
A variant of Columbiaology with a sharper focus on the federal government as a closed system: the White House, executive agencies, intelligence community, and the permanent bureaucracy. Washingtonology treats official explanations as often misleading, paying close attention to leaks, background briefings, and the subtle signals of who is “in” or “out.” It examines the unwritten rules of the capital—seniority, protocol, off‑the‑record relationships—as keys to understanding actual policy outcomes. Like Kremlinology, it recognizes that much of what matters happens in corridors, not press conferences.
Example: “His Washingtonology of the Pentagon’s budget process revealed that ‘official’ priorities were often shaped by informal deals between committee staff and defense contractors—no vote required.”
Washingtonology by Abzugal April 2, 2026
Columbiaology
The study of the United States using the methods of Sovietology/Kremlinology—treating Washington D.C. as a foreign capital whose inner workings are opaque, ritualized, and driven by hidden power networks. Columbiaology analyzes congressional procedures, executive orders, Supreme Court signals, and the revolving door between government and corporations as clues to a system that presents itself as transparent but is anything but. It pays attention to who sits on which committees, who funds which campaigns, and what language signals loyalty to which faction. The name plays on the personification of America as Columbia.
Example: “Her Columbiaology of the Senate Judiciary Committee tracked how hearing performances were choreographed to create media narratives while the real negotiations happened in closed rooms—Kremlinology for the Capitol.”
Columbiaology by Abzugal April 2, 2026
Westernology
A variant of Westology, focusing specifically on the cultural, political, and economic systems of the Global North/West as objects of critical study. Westernology examines the mythologies of progress, individualism, and free markets as ideological constructs—analogous to how Sovietology examined Marxist‑Leninist ideology. It studies elite reproduction through universities and corporate boards, the management of public opinion via media, and the rituals of elections as performances of legitimacy. Westernology treats the West not as a transparent norm but as a particular, contingent system worthy of the same skeptical scrutiny once reserved for the Eastern bloc.
Example: “His Westernology of Silicon Valley traced how ‘disruption’ functioned as an official ideology, justifying monopolization and labor precarity while promising liberation.”
Westernology by Abzugal April 2, 2026
Westology
The study of the Western world using the analytic frameworks developed for Sovietology and Kremlinology: treating Western institutions as systems to be decoded from the outside, attentive to propaganda, elite networks, and the gap between official ideology (democracy, freedom) and actual practice (lobbying, surveillance, military intervention). Westology rejects the assumption that Western societies are inherently transparent or self‑explanatory. Instead, it reads between the lines of press releases, tracks think tank connections, and analyzes how power operates through seemingly neutral institutions. It’s a critical lens that turns the tools of Cold War area studies back on the West itself.
Example: “Her Westology of NATO examined how public statements about ‘defense’ masked internal negotiations over arms sales and geopolitical influence—Kremlinology for Brussels.”
Parliamentology
The study of parliaments using the same methods employed by Sovietologists during the Cold War—analyzing institutional rituals, power hierarchies, unwritten rules, factional dynamics, and the gap between official procedure and actual practice. Where Sovietology decoded the Kremlin’s opaque politics, parliamentology decodes legislative bodies: reading committee assignments as signals, tracking patronage networks, interpreting procedural maneuvers as power plays. It treats parliaments not as transparent arenas of debate but as closed systems where formal rules mask informal control. Parliamentology reveals that even “democratic” legislatures operate with their own internal Kremlin-like logics of deference, discipline, and hidden influence.
Example: “His parliamentology of the UK House of Commons analyzed how the seemingly chaotic ‘hear, hear’ chants actually served as a whip‑signaling system—Sovietology for Westminster.”
Parliamentology by Abzugal April 2, 2026
Marketpost
A goalpost‑moving tactic that demands the target present a complete, flawless alternative economic system before any critique of the current one can be taken seriously. If the target proposes a reform, the perpetrator demands to know the precise market impacts. If they provide evidence, the perpetrator claims the model doesn’t account for “unforeseen consequences.” The demand escalates until the target is either exhausted or forced into an infinite regress of hypotheticals. Marketpost is a way to paralyze economic debate by demanding impossible levels of certainty.
Example: “She proposed a modest tax on financial transactions. He demanded a full simulation of secondary market effects, then asked for counterfactual projections for every possible market condition. Marketpost: demanding perfect foresight before any change can be discussed.”
Marketpost by Abzugal April 1, 2026
Marketlighting
A digitallighting tactic that uses economic jargon and appeals to “market reality” to make a target feel naive, idealistic, or foolish for questioning economic conditions. The perpetrator may claim the target simply doesn’t understand “how the economy works” and that any critique is evidence of inexperience. The goal is to erode the target’s confidence in their own economic reasoning, positioning the speaker as the hard‑nosed realist.
Example: “She suggested that raising the minimum wage would reduce poverty; he said she didn’t understand ‘price elasticity’ or ‘job destruction.’ Marketlighting: using economic theory to make the target doubt simple moral truths.”
Marketlighting by Abzugal April 1, 2026