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Definitions by A Real, Genuine Human

Murphy’s Monday 

A term taken from Murphy’s Law, A Murphy’s Monday is a Monday that is so incredibly annoying that it feels like everything that can go wrong IS going wrong. It is a day filled with minor inconveniences that make your day harder, but not hard enough to be impossible.

A Murphy’s Monday is not usually the worst day of your life, but certainly the most inconvenient.
Joseph: “Dude some guy just shot my friend’s grandma!”
Lukas: “Bro’s having a Murphy’s Monday.”

Chesterfield Gambit

Whenever your friend does something so fucking clutch that you make up a bullshit name for it so that it seems like it was planned.
Dude, Brian just shot my grandma!”
“Ain’t no way bro just pulled the Chesterfield Gambit!”