Wasturbation 

The act of masturbating and using wasabi as lubricant.

The term originated in Japanese camps within the United States during World War II when many prisoners did not have proper lube to pleasure themselves.

After a long lonely night, the restaurant was empty so the sushi chef decided to wasturbate.

Oh man, it hurts so good!!! He exclaimed after he finished a marvelous wasturbation session

Wasturbation by Ninja-m8 September 14, 2016

transturbation 

masturbating while riding on public transportation

Person #1 : Does that bum have his hand down his pants while staring at me?
Person #2 : Haha classic, transturbation on the city bus.

transturbation by Magnen July 20, 2010

tabsturbation 

Masturbation to porn on a tablet because your porn computer is previously occupied/full of viruses.

Totally Not Gay Dude 1) "How have you been making due while your computer is in the shop, Eric?"

Totally Not Gay Dude 2) "It's been great! I did some tabsturbation on my way to work."

Mom) "What were you doing in the bathroom for an hour?"

Son) "Tabsturbating, it was quiet in there and it actually has a lock. DON'T JUDGE ME!"

tabsturbation by Nizzl September 30, 2011

wasturbation 

n. massage the skin on your elbow
see also:
v. wasturbate - to massage the skin on your elbow
n. wenis - the skin on your elbow

Ouch, I scrapped my wenis! Now I have to wasturbate

Wasturbation is an easy and fun way to make your wenis feel better.

wasturbation by Nonamecharley May 23, 2006

Twisturbation 

Posting something on Twitter in an effort (conscious or otherwise) to stroke one's own ego, i.e. what nearly every single Twitter user is doing nearly every single time they post something on Twitter. The post itself can be of either a positive or negative nature; the only aspect of import is its lack of useful content, much like actual masturbation.

If you glance, even once, at Snooki's Twitter feed, you have enabled a Twisturbation addict.

Kanye West routinely engages in Twisturbation, showering the masses with his nonsense.

Twisturbation by TheShaz January 6, 2012

Tweeturbation 

The act of tweeting yourself on purpose, or by accident.

Roy: @roy has some serious tweeturbation happening here!

Tweeturbation by wjrcoop October 11, 2012

GWASturbation 

The act of performing and publishing useless and overbearing genome-wide association studies (GWAS) that serve no other purpose than to confuse people about the contribution of genetics to social and behavioural traits.

Professor Smith's misleading paper on how some genetic markers associate with educational attainment is another sorry example of gwasturbation

GWASturbation by proffunguy January 27, 2020