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9.
A once good actor turned completely insane. He is now engaged to actress Katie Holmes (who looks like she's twelve but is still taller than him). Tom Cruise also VERY OPENLY practices scientology. Scientologists, I'm convinced, are trying to TAKE OVER THE UNIVERSE. I mean seriously, anything started and made popular in LA has to be frigged up. They have schools, and art classes, and buildings. ITS FRIGHTENING!!! How can you have a "religion" based off of a sci-fi novel anyway???? It makes no sense.

But really, he had a list of all the single actresses in Hollywood that he could go out with. Katie Holmes was at the end of the list. A girl has to have some pride.
"Oh my God. When she saw Brad Pitt, she went all Tom Cruise and started jumping up and down on my couch. GAWD. Now we need to get new upholstery."

"Poor Batman, he has to kiss Mrs. Tom Cruise."

"YOU SHOW EM, TOM. KICK SOME ALIEN ASS! Ooh wait...nevermind you got sucked up into the ship..."
by Mrs. Hayden Christensen July 03, 2005
354 93
 
1.
Overrated douchebag who practices scientology and poisons today's youth
Tom Cruise is well-known and famous for playing the sexually-frustrated homosexual aviator "Maverick" in Top Gun
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2.
Movie star who only uses 2 facial expressions in every movie he's in: smiling and not smiling.
Bad guy: I can see that your very upset.
Tom Cruise: You've never seen me...very upset.
by scuba steve January 21, 2005
2169 364
 
3.
A person who will reduce themselves to doing absolutely ridiculous acts to avoid being labeled as a homosexual. These acts and publicity stunts do more damage to one's reputation than coming out of the closet would.
Tom Cruise danced around like a damn fool on the Oprah show, trying to convince us all that he just LOOOOVES Katie Holmes.
by TomIsCruisinInTheCloset June 21, 2005
1721 322
 
4.
A Dip Shit. An advocate of the ineptly named Scientology (formed by an former science fiction writer), which chooses to ignore the sciences of Sociology and Psychology in order to please a few of its most wealthy contributors.

My psychiatric advice for Tom is that he should stick to mediocre acting in mediocre movies. Heres to you dieing of a drug OD sometime soon :).
Here we see Tom out of his natural habitat, doing a live interview with Matt Lauer. Notice how eloquent he is.

TOM CRUISE: No. No. Abs-- Matt, that is-- the-- post-- now-- now, you're talking about two different things.


Once more... Tom flexes his intellectual muscles.

TOM CRUISE: Okay. So, now you look at-- and you go okay. A-- a departure from that ideal scene is someone taking drugs, okay. And then you go, okay. What is the theory and the science behind that, that justifies that?
by Snappy June 25, 2005
1281 293
 
5.
Exremely soluble professional couch-jumper and squinter. See asshole.
You're a jerk! Now why would you do that?
by hooptie-ryder June 28, 2005
896 254
 
6.
A loopy-ass muthafucka who jumps up on sofas and embarasses Dawson's girlfriend all the time. See wack.
Tom Cruise is wack. He needs to get up out of Oprah's grill and stop jumping around like a 5 year old.
by Chilla June 29, 2005
826 245
 
7.
Slang for insane, insanity, gone crazy.
Did you notice how Katie Holmes dissappeared from the world for two weeks? She's gone totally Tom Cruise.
by Horsiest Q. Ravishing July 06, 2005
718 184