That's not a thing 

Phrase used to denote frustration with or to dismiss a concept or notion that either

A.) Makes no sense
B.) Is not widely known
C.) Does not exist

Person 1: I heard you were sick, what do you have? Chicken pox? Measles? Armenian Bird Flu?
Person 2: Wha-? That's not a thing

Person 1: This new body lotion I have works by activating the fourth and third chakras
Person 2: That's not even a thing

That's not a thing by BlackMan646 February 5, 2010

That's not even a thing 

Thought to have originated from the "That 70's Show" quote "...is that a thing?". Highschooler Joshua MacLatchie coined this phrase to mean you are absolutely sure that isn't even a real thing.

This also predates Seinfeld because fuck physics.

Ex:

Zach: I totally dunked my balls in her ass last night, shit was so cash.

Shim-sham: That's not even a thing.

That's not even a thing by 100%RealFactChecker July 8, 2014

***DISCLAIMER***: i did not actually [bad thing] This was a form of comedic expression where I say something outrageous that I actually didn't do, but say I did. 

Saying: "***DISCLAIMER***: i did not actually bad thing This was a form of comedic expression where I say something outrageous that I actually didn't do, but say I did." Is a form of comedic expression where I say something outrageous that I actually didn't do, but say I did, then put a disclaimer confirming that the outrageous thing I said I did was a joke, even if it was obvious it was a joke without the disclaimer

Person 1: I fucked my mom ***DISCLAIMER***: i did not actually bad thing This was a form of comedic expression where I say something outrageous that I actually didn't do, but say I did.
Person 2: PFFT- WHY THE DISCLAIMER? 💀💀

***DISCLAIMER***: i did not actually [bad thing] This was a form of comedic expression where I say something outrageous that I actually didn't do, but say I did. by Josuke's Hair Is Best Hair August 19, 2023