Telemarketing 

Noun. Also known as telescams and cold calls. When a salesperson calls you unexpectantly and offers you something you don't want or need, such as double glazing.

In the US and Australia, telemarketing is restricted and policed. In the UK, it is less controlled, because otherwise it would clash with the free speech laws.

Telemarketing is the bain of most houseowners' existences, and will guarentee you a place in Hades if you ever get a job in a telemarketing company.

"God, I only asked my girlfriend to sell her body for money, it's not like I asked her to go into telemarketing!" - Jeremy (Robert Webb), Peep Show

Telemarketing by Public Enemy Number 42 April 29, 2008

telejerking

Portmanteau of "teleworking" and "jerking". This occurs when you have an office job that requires such little time and effort, that on snowy days when employees telework from home, you can have several jerk-off sessions while technically being paid.

Such jobs are usually only afforded to government employees and sometimes government contractors, since deadlines don't mean anything to their bosses and they will be paid regardless of performance.

Rick: I telejerked yesterday and today. How do you feel knowing that your tax dollars go to pay me for choking my chicken two times before lunch while looking at porn on my work computer? Yeah, and that conference call at 2? I was shitting while I was on the phone. Tomorrow will be my third consecutive day of telejerking due to the chain of command in my office being populated by spineless men who employee only college interns and sassy black ladies that literally contribute nothing to the ability of our government to function.

telejerking by DHS Employee February 14, 2014

telewanking 

Ostensibly at home working but in fact at home jerking off.

The states and the feds have instituted a widely popular system of telewanking that allows folks to collect their full paychecks while honing their binge watching skills.

telewanking by Dr Bunnygirl March 19, 2021

Telemarketing 

Something where people who dropped out of high school can go and make money by making unwanted calls to people over the phone.

Telemarketing is the stupidest thing ever invented in the history of telephones.

Telemarketing by Scottish_Emperor843 December 23, 2018

I'm in Telemarketing 

What a prostitute says she does for a living to someone she is trying to date. Hence the term "call girl" (She's really telemarketing that azz!)

Ryan: So what do you do for a living?
Krystall: Oh I'm in telemarketing.
Ryan: Wow! Miss independent! hehe! I'm wanna take you home to meet the parents!

(Later while on Facebook looking at Krystall's profile)
"Wow look at those stacks of Benjamin's all over her floor, she must make good money at that telemarketing job," Ryan thought to himself.

I'm in Telemarketing by Da Quizzler October 21, 2011

teleworking 

Working in a virtual organization, commonly referred to as "working from home".

Since the office is 30 miles away, in traffic, I prefer to telework when possible.

teleworking by Seth Eaton April 25, 2005

telemocking 

1.) to make fun of a show on television
2.) to watch a show for the specific purpose of making fun of it.

John: Hey dude, are you watch Dora the Explorer?!
Jim: Relax man, I don't really like this show I'm just telemocking it.
John: don't you have anything better to do?
Jim: Nope

telemocking by ersher February 24, 2008