scissor me timbers 

A phrase used in a south park episode where Mr. or Ms. Garrison explored being a lesbian. Garrison was in bed with another woman "scissoring" (in which two women inter-lock each others legs for sexual arrousal). it is at this time that Garrison becomes excited and says "Oh yeah scissor me timbers!!!".

Lesbian: "I haven't gotten a piece of ass in a while I really wish somebody would scissor me timbers."

scissor me timbers by Steven Siravo April 21, 2007

Scissor me timbers 

A variation of "shiver me timbers," a common pirating term, screamed by women during lesbian lovemaking. The term refers to their interlocking legs, which are often spread at an angle similar to open scissors.

"How does this double headed dildo feel, lesbian lover?"

"Scissor me timbers!"

Scissor me timbers by Motorboating SOB April 13, 2009

scissor me timbers 

referring to the sexual postion for lesbains"scissoring"

scissor me timbers we're scissoring!

scissor me timbers by Holly Matronic May 29, 2007

scissor me timber

The act of two females scissoring while a male is underneath with his penis up between their vagina's.

I caught an early flight home and walked in on my wife scissoring some chick, to which I replied "Hmmmm... Perhaps this would be a good time to scissor me timber!"

scissor me timber by Ssylar October 27, 2008

Scissor Me Timber

1. A phrase known as an activity of sexual satisfaction amongst an assemblage of lady pirates.

2. The female attempt to dismember a man's penis from his body by utilizing the unyielding strength of her labial lips.

i.e. Sever Me Timbers

Lady Pirates? Scissor me timbers? Get it?

ARRRGH! As she wrapped her legs about his torso with the force of one-thousand seahorse, her lips opened like the fearsome kraken to disarm the man of his weary vessel. "Scissor me timber," he shouted in vain, "if I weren't still coming I would feel wretched pain!"

Scissor Me Timber by Long Jane Silver March 12, 2010

Scissorfest

The Holiday celebrated on December 20th in which a group of two or more females scissor from dawn to dusk. There is usually a head female known as the "Scissor Queen" that presides over the group as they perform the sacred art of scissoring. The celebration begins with a sensual dance of the traditional scissoring variety and then degrades into a full on scissoring session. As the festival draws to a close, the group slows down and some soft Barry Manilow is played as the girls cool off with some ice cold soft drinks. The festival is then brought to an end by the Scissor Queen who must sacrifice a small calf and nibble on its intestines to gain the creatures power, as divine rite dictates her to do so.

This is how the festival is dictated to occur within the ancient book; the Art of Scissoring by C.S. Lewis.

" Hey Jenna, are you excited for Chistmas this year?"

"Golly Gee, Franklin, No I totally forgot about Christmas! I'm just much to excited for Scissorfest this year."

"Your a skank Jenna."

Scissorfest by Scissor Queen October 29, 2009

ScissorPeee

It’s when you fuck the living shit out of the scissor until your teacher starts to cry

Omg mr finkleman can we scissorpeee

ScissorPeee by Thorny.19 March 8, 2020