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A push gift is demanded by a JAP to compensate for her labor pains and to reward her platinum womb for bringing another child into the world. The give is delivered immediately and I do mean immediately upon giving birth.

The second that the brand new baby exits the vagina to be wiped down, the pussy-whipped husband gives his shrew of a wife a significant item of jewelry. Typically, the price is at least $20,000 and preferably $30,000.

Whether that is to compensate for the incredible sacrifice or merely to deal with the impending post-partum depression has not yet been determined. The utter repulsiveness of the extremely crass act defies description by mere mortals with any sense of humility or shame.

The vast majority of the human race, approaching 99%, would believe that the sheer joy of a new baby would be the most incredible gift of life that a couple could possibly want to celebrate. In fact, that is usually what happens.

Ask yourself what type of person would demand a push gift.
She dropped a lot of hints for her push gift. She left Tiffany catalogs and similar overt messages lying around the house and instructed the maid to not disturb them.

The younger generation seems to be more inclined to push gifts. They have that crying need for instant gratification and ersatz experience to compensate for a fundamental, deep-seated terror in the face of real life. Older mothers would never dream of something so grotesque as a jewelry display in a delivery room. They at least had enough dignity to wait until they got into their private rooms in the recovery ward.

My mom's generation got their push gifts in the form of new cars to drive home from the hospital, or a new nursery for baby and a new wardrobe for mom to try on after that first spa week in the Hamptons or the Berkshires. The low rent version is in Atlantic City.

My friend Tom says that push gifts are just installments of vaginamony.
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Cigarette: Northern slang for a cigarette, used oft by mashed up mancunian ravers becasue of the resemblance of a hot(electric)stove to the end of a lit cigarette. Originated circa 1991 in the early halcyon days of the rave culture; we speculate during a drug fuelled hallucination by said manc.
'fuck me noel, i am bolloxed, is that a ciggy in your mouth, or the stove from me 'nans kitchen'/
General use: 'Give us a stove you cunt'
stove by anthony willison March 18, 2004
Word of the Day on August 4, 2026
Related Words

Walky-Talky 

A derogatory term for able bodied people or people that can walk. This definition was coined by disabled influencer Valerie Weber
Person in wheelchair: “look at that walky-talky over there.”

Friend in wheelchair: *looking at person who is walking* “yeah haha
Walky-Talky by odd muffin October 5, 2021
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Scrapnel 

(N) :
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A hardo is a person who tries extremely hard at everything. Most times a hardo will try very hard at things that do not require excessive effort. For example, sports practices, gym class, etc.
Wow did you see Jack at practice today? What a hardo!
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a sign of love or flirtatious language between two emo people.
do you want to go listen to peirce the veil later? rawr xD

okeeez rawr xD
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Word of the Day on July 31, 2026

cfm boots 

come fuck me boots - style of dress made famous by 1980's Jersey girls who liked Bon Jovi and big hair.

Look at those cfm boots.
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Word of the Day on July 30, 2026