Something people say because they think that saying it makes something less offensive.
Bob: No offense Joe, but I hate you so much that I pray for your death daily. You're just a motherfucking cuntlicking son-of-a-bitch asswipe that needs to fuck off and die. You fuck your mother's vulva for fun.
Joe: Oh, that's okay, 'cause you said 'No offense'.
by Jimbo, M.D. September 04, 2011

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The phrase you use before you knowingly, intentionally, and viciously offend someone.
No offense, Nick, but we've always hated your guts and we're just using you for your big-screen...and your sister, who by the way is a raging slut. Especially after a couple shots of Cuervo.
by C-Mills November 29, 2010

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Used for pointing out something negative while trying not to offend someone. People now use this to offend without repercussions. Stupid shits.
Guy A: Putting your hand in the blender is really, no offense, uh, foolish.

Guy B: None taken.
by RiotRanger June 10, 2010

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Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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Something someone says right before saying something that may be offensive. as opposed to, say, not saying anything offensive at all.
You are such a completely moronic asshole. No offense
by LordXeras January 06, 2011

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

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What you say to someone when you purposefully and obviously mean something you said in an insulting way.
You are a niggerdouchefaggot bitch homo gayfuck bitch! no offense and you're retarded
by biathczsssww January 23, 2012

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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A pre-statement that allows for any possible offensive or derogatory remark you are about to declare. As long as the offensive remark has this pre-statement in front, it is assumed that the declarer is not to be held accountable for the repercussions of the statement to follow. If this is declared post-statement, the safety net is somewhat removed, the statement loses some girth, and the speaker can be held accountable to the spoken words.
Example 1 Pre-statement:

John: "No offense Betty, but you are the worst employee in this entire company and no one enjoys your presence. Also, I do not find you physically attractive and I think you are a bitch."

Steve: "Dude, how can you be so harsh!?"

Betty: "Don't be such a prude Steve, he said no offense first; it's cool bro."

Example 2 Post-statement:

Mike: "Wow Cindy, I cannot believe you slept with everyone on the 3rd floor, you are such a slut; no offense."

Cindy: "OMG."

Tim: "Mike - you're fired."
by Joey Fizzle May 04, 2016

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

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