Piro - The webmaster, artist, and main character of the comic. He is portrayed as a innocent pansy nerd, with a kink for Japanese girls and a obsessive sock fetish. Thankfully, his wussiness has restrained him from several potential scenes of rape throughout the comic, thus keeping the material clean for all readers.
Largo - Stereotypical gamer and avid comptuer overclocker, babbles in nonsensical "l33tsp33k", and due to his constant binging, has incredible resistance to physical punishment, which aids him well in his quest to purge all of Japan of "zombies", possibly a fabrication of his manic America Versus Japan culture clashing.
"The Queen" - Archnemesis of Largo, she posesses formidable skills in gaming, rivaling the disillusioned yankee himself. Intrigued by Largo's stubborness to cling onto his assinine beliefs, much of her story involves a complex silent-romance between her and the unwary Largo.
Hayasaka-San - One of the first friends Piro makes in Japan, she works in a game shop downtown. She keeps to herself about her personal life, and fends off sexual predators with voracious ferocity.
Generic Schoolwhore - A teenager of 16, she too has a crush with Piro, and with the pressure of her two bimbo peers, is forced into a shakey relationship with the reclusive twigboy.
Largo - "OMGz! U teh fag0rt! I teh l33t mast0rz! Git off me l33t n3tw0rk n0de u teh n00b!"
"The Queen" - "Dark, blackness, consuming me, tearing me up from the inside, can't endure for much longer.... tendrils fingering my asshole.... my sanity is about to crack.... death, darkness, destruction...."
Hayasaka-San - "Get any closer to me and i'll break your other arm!"
Generic Schoolwhore - "Kawaii! Oh my god, your so cute! Cutey Cutey Cutey ^-^! Hey handsome, how about a appointment in my apartment at 1908 Hawasaka Avenue, i'll be dressing in that outfit you like.... meet me at 9:00 sharp, and dress SEXY!"