engineery

Overly technical, nerdy, and left-brained. Lacking warmth, charisma, empathy, and general social skills; slightly awkward while at times being uncomfortably pushy or passive aggressive.

We invite the non-technical employees to happy hour so things don't get too engineery.

Keep in mind this article will be read by all sorts of people so don't make it too engineery.

engineery by DGarb July 1, 2011

engineery

Of or pertaining to the concept of engineering or engineers.

Bill: Hey, what is that contraption?

Ted: I don't know, but it's really engineery.

engineery by akdom April 1, 2009

Pseudo-Engineer 

Sarcastic title, proudly used by those with Engineering degrees, when others without the degree, claim to be Engineers.

A supervisor introducing the working team to a new member:
"Even though he’s the only one with a real Engineering degree, Jack calls himself a Pseudo-Engineer because others here in the company claim to be Software Engineers but their degrees are from everything from Political Science to Accounting."

Pseudo-Engineer by truepseudonym July 9, 2018

Pseudo-Engineer 

1: A person without an Engineering Degree who claims being an Engineer simply because they work in Engineering tasks.

2: A person who hasn’t gone through the rigors of Engineering School, yet pretends to be an Engineer.

Guy 1: "Yeah, I'm an Engineer."
Guy 2: "Oh cool! My brother's an Engineer. What's your degree on?"
Guy 1: "Well, it's in Graphic Design, but I have a Java certification and write software for a living."
Guy 2: Snickers and thinks to himself "Perfect...another Pseudo-Engineer."

Pseudo-Engineer by truepseudonym July 9, 2018

the engineer 

Hey look buddy, I'm an engineer. That means I solve problems, not problems like "What is beauty?" Because that would fall within the purview of your conundrums of philosophy. I solve practical problems, for instance: how am I going to stop some mean mother Hubbard from tearing me a structurally superfluous be-hind? The answer, use a gun, and if that don't work... Use more gun. Take for instance this heavy caliber tripod mounted lil' old number designed by me, built by me, and you best hope... Not pointed at you.

meet the engineer

the engineer by Why not7 October 20, 2020

Meet the engineer 

Hey look buddy. I'm an engineer. That means I solve problems.

A shot rings out and a bullet hole appears next to the Engineer's head

Engie: Not problems like "What is beauty?", 'cause that would fall within the purview of your conundrums of philosophy.

Another two bullet holes appear, on the other side of the Engie's head.

Engineer: I solve practical problems.

the shot zooms out to show a level 2 sentry shooting offscreen while the Engie takes a long drink from his beer.

Heavy: AAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!

Engineer: For instance, how am I gonna stop some big mean Mother-Hubbard from tearin' me a structurally superfluous new behind?

A level 1 sentry turns around and shoots a sniper who was trying to creep up on the Engie from behind.

Engineer: The answer? Use a gun. And if that don't work, use more gun.

Another level 3 sentry fired a salvo of rockets, blowing up someone offscreen.

Someone, probably the scout: MY AAAARRRMMMM!!!!!

a blown-off hand lands at the Engie's feet

Engie: Like this, heavy-caliber tripod-mounted little-old-number designed by me,

Engie kicks the hand off screen as a level 1 sentry blows it apart

Engie: Built by me,

A level 1 sentry shoots offscreen

Engie: and you best hope;

The Engie's expression darkens, and he stares right at the camera

Engie: not pointed at you.

have you seen Meet the engineer?

Meet the engineer by Hey look buddy I’m an engineer September 19, 2020

Mastering Engineering 

An online homework program designed to rob college students of their hard-earned money and serve as a crutch for professors too lazy to write their own homework assignments or to teach. Its purpose, beyond making millions for the publishing company, is apparently to reduce the number of engineering graduates in the United States by utterly demoralizing and destroying their confidence in an effort to force them to drop the program and/or kill themselves.

I used up all but one attempt on this stupid Mastering Engineering problem, before I realized it had switched everything to kiloOhms instead of Ohms! And then I still got it wrong! FML!

Mastering Engineering by kypok April 16, 2012