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Coitus Procrastination

The act of thinking about football, soccer, golf, dead puppies, your mom etc etc during sexual intercourse causing a disruption in your exitement level and thus, not cumming as fast as you normally would (i.e. 1 minute)
Joe- I was about to cum while having sex with my girlfriend, but i had to resort to coitus procrastination since it had only been 45 seconds since penetration.

Mark- Awesome bro! I will start coitus procrastinating from now on!!

Pablo- Que? No el inglishh

Coitus Coif 

The hairstyle ( coiffure ) you wear after getting a proper and vigorous fucking.
Niiice coitus coif, Dude... she must've been on top this time?
Coitus Coif by Scrappy SamCat January 28, 2009

Coitus Conundrum 

When you are in a sistuation with two or more hot girls, and you can not identify the hotter girl or whichone you would sleep with.
Dave: Look at all these hot chicks!

Steve: Which one would you sleep with?

Dave: All of them.

Steve: Yeah, but if you had to pick just one.

Dave: ... (Coitus Conundrum)
Coitus Conundrum by Bagseven May 20, 2010

Post-Coitus Mortis 

The phase after climax in intercourse where a person becomes completely incapacitated after coitus.
"Hey babe, can you go make some coffee?"
"Can't. I have Post-Coitus Mortis."
Post-Coitus Mortis by Coffeepot666 November 17, 2021

Coitus cream 

A mixture of both you and your significant others love juice
Person 1:I had the best sex last night

Person 2: yea I bet you did I see your coitus cream on ur shirt
Coitus cream by Conker1 October 4, 2018

Coitus saxonicus 

Noun. A form of contraception where a man squeezes the base of his penis immediately prior to ejaculation so that the semen is diverted to the bladder.
Woman: Quagmire you forgot to buy a condom!
Quagmire : Don't worry darlin', tonight I'm using Coitus saxonicus! Giggity!
Coitus saxonicus by Quagman November 27, 2012