contraption adaption 

1) The period of time needed to familiarize oneself with a new electronic device.
2) Often, a period of extreme anxiety and frustration stemming from one's need to learn a lot of technical information in a short to non-existent period of time.

1) "I'm sorry, Joe. I won't be in to work today. I'm exhausted from staying up all night learning how to use my new i-phone and am suffering this morning from a bad case of contraption adaption."

2) "I'm now limiting my persuit of new e-toys to only those gadgets with a low level of contraption adaption."

3) The salesguy said: "If you buy this new Mac laptop today, I guarantee you'll start using it today." "Yeah, sure", I said. "I'll BET there's no contraption adaption for THIS machine!"

contraption adaption by Juan O'Malley July 22, 2009

Shit Contraction

Prior to taking a dump, you get horrible pains in your stomach. Those pains sometimes get so bad that you just want to lay on the ground and get into the fetal position.

Pregnant women get contractions and they must hurt a shit load and so do shit contractions.

Duder 1: Dude, hurry up in that bathroom, I have to take a dump!
Duder 2: Hold on, I'm only brushing my teeth.
Duder 1: I'm having shit contractions, please hurry up!

Shit Contraction by FoulMe January 4, 2012

conrapotion

conrapotion: the degree to which something, someplace, or someone gets so wrapped up in the drama (the moment) and the commotion, that nobody knows what's going on anymore.

Steven: "That wedding was so full of conrapotion that i thought i was watching a Days of our Lives episode.

Bridgett: "So in other words you loved it."

conrapotion by diz1776 June 17, 2009

Contractionitis 

The inability to use contractions, often making the person sound long winded due to the over emphasizing of mundane points.

Brad can not, will not, and does not use contractions due to a severe case of contractionitis.

Contractionitis by itsthatbradguy July 13, 2010

contraceptionist 

The absolute opposite of a hot receptionist/secretary.

A secretary so unappealing that not only would you never dare consider risking your job for sexual relations with her, but you're completely put off the entire female gender every time you pass her desk.

The fantasy Jim had been having involving Angelina Jolie, a desert island and a sack of viagra was completely nullified when he walked past his contraceptionist's desk.

contraceptionist by CapTim January 25, 2008

oral contraception

Oral sex that ends in orgasm without intercourse.

Sarah: I forgot to take my birth control.

Chris: We could do some home-made oral contraception.

oral contraception by Mike Comanche March 10, 2009

Celebrity Contraction 

When the Mass Media and/or tabloids combine the names of linked celebrities to save precious column space. ie. Bennifer, Brangelina

Guy: Did you hear Demishton just got married?
Girl: What?
Guy: Demishton, you know Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher.
Girl: Oh that is the Worst Celebrity Contraction ever.

Celebrity Contraction by Ben Faulding September 27, 2005