The inability to use contractions, often making the person sound long winded due to the over emphasizing of mundane points.
Brad can not, will not, and does not use contractions due to a severe case of contractionitis.
Offending a woman with offensive, obnoxious, irritating, and generally tasteless comments, causing her to try to leave the area as quickly as possible.
He would be getting some if he could just keep his mouth shut and avoid zaneing off every girl that comes around with his horrible jokes.
Premature balding found in test tube babies.
I went to the doctor and discovered that not only was I a test tube baby, but that this would cause me to develop glass pattern baldness by the time I am 23.
The incredibly obvious erection one gets when wearing a bathing suit that requires them to stay in the water to hide it until it subsides to avoid embarrassment.
I wanted to go lay on the beach after swimming in the ocean, but I was sporting a deep sea teepee from scoping chicks all afternoon and had to keep swimming.
A buildup of muscle mass in the bicep region due to excessive masturbation. Most commonly found in porn addicts and the socially inept.
Man goddamnit listen my wife put parental controls on my computer, making flexing of my masturbicep harder.
adj. Financially beneficial. Economically prudent.
Investing in the stock market was a business good decision.
The most disgusting of beverages. Made taking a bottle (preferably plastic) of low end wine and pouring it into a pint glass filled with ice. Over dosages may cause the development of an eyebrow fetish.
After 5 or 6 glasses of ice wine, I can't help but have impure thoughts about that girl's eyebrows! I blame the plastic residue in the wine.