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contraceptionist 

The absolute opposite of a hot receptionist/secretary.

A secretary so unappealing that not only would you never dare consider risking your job for sexual relations with her, but you're completely put off the entire female gender every time you pass her desk.
The fantasy Jim had been having involving Angelina Jolie, a desert island and a sack of viagra was completely nullified when he walked past his contraceptionist's desk.
contraceptionist by CapTim January 25, 2008
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contreceptionist 

The absolute opposite of a hot receptionist/secretary.

A secretary so unappealing that not only would you never dare consider risking your job for sexual relations with her, but you're completely put off the entire female gender every time you pass her desk.
The fantasy Jim had been having involving Angelina Jolie, a desert island and a sack of viagra was completely nullified when he walked past his contreceptionist's desk.
contreceptionist by CapTim January 25, 2008

Expansionist and Contractionist Spacetime Theory

A cosmological framework that treats the universe’s large‑scale expansion and potential future contraction not as passive consequences of initial conditions but as active, competing principles. Expansionist forces (dark energy, inflation) push spacetime outward, increasing distances and diluting matter; contractionist forces (gravity, dark matter) pull it inward, potentially leading to a “Big Crunch.” The theory models the history and future of the cosmos as a dynamic tension between these two tendencies, with possible cyclic phases. It also explores local variations—regions that expand while others contract—and the implications for structure formation and the ultimate fate of the universe.
Example: “Expansionist and contractionist spacetime theory suggested that our universe might be just one bubble in a foam where some bubbles expand forever and others collapse—eternal tension, eternal renewal.”