Skip to main content

The Calendar Option 

A technique of temporarily “saving face” with colleagues, bosses, customers, and auditors by changing every calendar and clock in a particular workplace in an effort to cover up a missed deadline. “The Calendar Option” is the “Nuclear Option” of work place fault misdirection. “The Calendar Option” should only be used when the monumental task of changing dozens of calendars, clocks, and watches pales in comparison to actually completing ones assigned task on time. Hacking of local computer and cellular networks is usually preferred, as these sources represent the primary ways of determining dates and times. “The Calendar Option” will buy you enough time to prepare a resume, write a cover page, and apply for other jobs in the timespan prior to your superiors realizing you’ve elegantly gamed them to death. Worried about future employment? Don’t! One who can successfully employ “The Calendar Option” is often far under-employed anyway. This fact is clearly demonstrated as the time, energy, intelligence and sheer skill required to pull off the maneuver could be accomplished by no less than an American, tier 1, Special Forces operator who is also a Ninja.
Are you late? Can’t blame a colleague? Can’t blame your computer? Can’t blame the weather? Don’t even bother! Just employ “The Calendar Option” and you won’t need to blame a thing because the calendar and clocks say “you’re not late!”

late nuclear option option ninja bad employee blame
The Calendar Option mug front
Get the The Calendar Option mug.
See more merch

Charles Calvin 

A guy with the greatest plans.His plans are ramming his helicopter into things.
Person 1:Hey Charles Calvins plans are the worst.
Person 2:Your a f**king idiot.
Person 1:I`m right tho
Person 2:I will f**king throw you off a cliff
Charles Calvin by SofiaBandita September 2, 2020
Related Words

calvin and hobbes 

The most kickass comic series ever written! Bill Watterson is my home dog!
Calvin:Mom's not feeling well, so I'm going to make her a get well card.
Hobbes:That's thoughtful of you
Calvin:See, on the front it says 'Get well soon, and on the inside it says because my bed isn't made, my clothes need to be put away, and I'm hungry. Love Calvin.' Want to sign it?
Hobbes:Sure, I'm hungry too.

calentada 

A prison term that’s you’re going to get jumped by your raza for not following the rules
That’s fool is going to get a calentada if he keeps fucking up
calentada by Wickedspic December 9, 2018

alexander calvert 

The most motherfucking beautiful human being according to literally everyone who likes supernatural a goddamn smocking hot bab but his personality is like a baby boy because he is a child
Alexander Calvert’s new name is papi chulo-SSD

Papita caliente 

Expression you use when you’re extremely happy and excited for eating french fries.

Expresión usada cuando estas extremadamente feliz y emocionado por comer papas fritas.
Hummmm papita caliente !!!
Papita caliente by Quesadillas222 December 17, 2021
Putrid liquified pungent green baby feces. Obscure French slag.
Usually occurs when a person has had a bad diet of wine and pomme-frites.
“If I go out drinking tonight I’ll end up having a such a sore stinging calvert”.

Je ne veux pas avoir un mauvais calvert - I don’t want to have a bad shit.
Calvert by Mr Corbeire December 18, 2020